Life Before Lynn (pt.2)

As I said yesterday Rosie wasn’t really a girlfriend, just a person I dated. Most of my memories involve Lynn, so I want to get these other past lives out of the way. I wrote more than I expected about Rosie, so I must have more to say about Corneille, we were engaged for about 15 years.

(One of) my brothers was invited to the 18th birthday party for one of his friends. When his mother was reviewing his list and realised who he was, she extended the list to include the whole of the family. I can’t remember which way round it was but either she was Bridesmaid at my Mothers wedding or my Mother was Bridesmaid at her wedding. I was just sitting at a table on my own listening to the music being played by the DJ when I girl came up to me and asked if she could sit in the seat next to me. I said of course and we spent a pleasant amount of time conversing. It ended with her asking for my phone number. I was happy to give her this information but I didn’t think anything would come of it. However, the vey next day she phoned and invited me for tea. When I got to the door of her house it was opened by her Mother.who asked who I was and was surprised to hear that Corneille had invited me for tea because she hadnt told her.

I’ve just realised I’m having difficulty in organising our relationship. We started seeing each other on a regular basis very quickly and I learnt a lot about women in the process. She had visited me at my home when I owned (on mortgage) a bed sit, it was at that time I realised that I might need somewhere bigger. So I sold the bedsit and purchased a 2nd-hand house. We went on coach holidays every year and it wasn’t long before we got engaged. Whenever her Mum and Stepfather wanted to go out she stayed overnight with me plus most of the weekends. We tended to return earlish on the Sunday, which was when her parents hosted a Trivial Pursuit Night and I was an honorary member of the men’s team.

Perhaps the most memorable moments were the holidays but I’ve decided to put my holiday memories into a separate post. I’m now going to use a statement that shouldn’t be used any more. You probably won’t have realised from what I said above but she was “Mentally Handicapped”. I think it is relevant to put it in that way because her Stepfather was Chairman (another phrase that shouldn’t be used) of the Derby branch of the Mencap Society and her Mother was Secretary. I don’t think the branch exists anymore because the last time I looked at the building they used had been relabelled as Shield, which I think is a Homeless charity. I’m now supposed to say that Corneille had learning difficulties. Still True but the society didn’t have to change its name. 1 year the Society organised a twinning visit. People from Osnabruck would stay with families in this country for one year and we would visit their homes the next. I was happy to help but the only way I could help was by having Corneille stay with me whilst a German couple stayed in her room. The following year all 4 of us were able to stay in the same property. It was an extension to the main building. Apparently in Germany when a family wants more room the family home is extended, whereas in this country we tend to move house. The highlights of this visit will be noted in the afore mentioned holiday post.

It was fairly early in our relationship, I’m not quite sure if it was before or after the visit to Osnabruck, but I wanted to be more involved in her activities. So I went to an annual meeting of the society. The members of the society needed to be re-elected and they were looking for somebody to run the bar. So I went to say I would be happy to help run the bar. Somewhere along the lines I also got myself elected on to the committee. Running the bar was fairly easy, it meant opening cans and filling the glasses and the sale of snacks at the weekly club meetings.  I also needed to make sure the stocks were replenished – they were also considering giving me the card to buy the stocks with but our relationship ended before that event took place. I’m not sure what I contributed to the committee until a year or 2 down the line when I got elected has Secretary. Her Mum wanted to stand down as Secretary and both her and her husband was getting tired of being virtually alone in organising the events of the Society. The couple that came to their home oh Sunday wanted to stand down from the committee but it was difficult to find other people to stand forward.

You may be wondering why the long engagement didn’t turn into a marriage – well so am I actually. Her Mother accepted reluctantly her getting engaged to me but didn’t believe that Cornelle would be capable of looking after us both. This is quite true, but I shouldn’t have allowed that to be a consideration. We should have eloped – we would have still been married now and I would have some money and still be working at RR, but I would have missed out on the adventures yet to come.

The ending of our relationship is very complicated because I seem to have 2 timelines mixed together in my brain. I have tried to rearrange my thoughts into a logical order and should be close to the truth. Cornelle lived with her Mother and Stepfather. An incident led to her going to live with her Uncle. During that time I didn’t get to see very much of her, which led me to reviewing the my situation. I couldn’t see the point of staying in a relationship that didn’t seem to be going anywhere. Her Aunt and Uncle wasn’t very happy about that because apparently they would have put everything in place to allow us to get married – Things might have turned out differently if they had told me that. After breaking up I joined a dating agency which led to the relationship with Rita and subsequently Lynn but I will continue that thread in the final part of this series tomorrow.

As I said, her Aunt and Uncle weren’t very happy and not long after she was living with her Sister. It was then her stepfather got involved – he didn’t worry while she was living with her Uncle because he knew that she would be looked after but he didn’t believe the same would be true when living with her Sister. Although deemed as being able to look after herself, her Sister had Emotional as well as Mental problems which could inflict problems in her ability to look after somebody else. This led to her living in a hostel and not long after, she started coming back to the Mencap Club where I was still barman. Her brain hadn’t accepted that we were now just friends and not a couple. She started ringing me up at home, but that upset Lynn who I was now with, so she complained to her mother and I resigned as Barman. That led to Cornelle being moved to another hostel, location unknown who weren’t given my contact details.

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