The adventures of Tart and Star
Tart ( aka ) yorkshirerose and Star had met on SC, They became firm friends. Yorkshirerose had been dubbed a tart because of her services to mankind ( she was kind to men ) she had worked flat out to achieve this title, and thoroughly deserved it. ,Star was a user and Tart a follower,Star didn’t really care for Tart as a person (she was devoid of any personality ) but she had become addicted to the Yorkshire accent, she had sought help and was undergoing therapy, but as of yet, any fella with a Yorkshire accent and a pulse was fair game.
Over their daily tipple at the local pub an idea came to Star, they were in a rut, Star had been having nightmares about becoming as brain dad as Tart, she needed to act fast, Tart was at the bar paying for the third time for the drinks, a pint of Guiness for herself ( she said doctor had recommended 10 pints a day for her Annemia) this of course was total bulls t, Star went along with it, Tart was her sidekick,and as of yet she needed her around, Star was more refined, her drink was a pint of Addlestones cider.
The idea……… to buy a touring caravan. Star didn’t have any money, time to visit ex friends who she could hit on for the ready’s, they would willingly give her the cash, they knew she would become a menace in her relentless pursuit of money, they paid up.
Next step, purchase of said tourer, preloved site visited, caravan found, viewing booked. Speaks to the seller, pretended she knew what he was talking about ( hadn’t got a clue ) she didn’t need to have, there would be guys on the site more than willing to help a damsel in distress. enough time wasted, time to get the deal done, hadn’t got the money for the asking price,( was he having a laugh ) hadn’t got enough for half the asking price, here Tart comes in handy. Star explains that her friend has Asthma and needs to be near the river and the trees so that she gets more oxygen, cue Tart producing Sainsburys carrier bag, drops it, out tumble 35 inhalers, seller looks duly shocked, Star makes offer on caravan, seller looks duly shocked. Tart scrambling on the floor retrieving inhalers, looks up at seller, bottom lip quivering, tears rolling down her face, done deal. SUCKER !!
To be continued…………. .”..First night on the site.”
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A Star and a Tart with a caravan lol I think laughter is going to be involved, love it xxx
Hurry up and continue!!!,hehehehehe,i have a good feeling about this.hahaha.
Advertising ‘Sainsburys’ is cheap, Star. Just as cheap as a tart!!!!! lol 😉
A tarts cheaper than a hooker Polly…..but my sidekick Tart, she doesn’t charge at all . Sainsburys pay me well, covers my site fees for the year. lol x
well me lost i have no idea of what i have just read but carry on i will pick up the thread x
If this is fiction, it is first rate, if it is autobiographical, yummy!
Half and half oldbull………up to yet that is. He He.xx
Awwwwww Steve, I will explain later, you ok…long time no see xx
I new you was not my friend but this beats everything you done and said about me ..you really are a bitch….. wait till I get you in that caravan down by the canal , dont go to sleep cause one nite you be in that canal.
I’ll make sure that body guard of yours is asleep I’ll put one of my pills in his drink when you not watching me…..shucks I told you what I going to do but I am not like you I love your body gaurd got to get him on my side some how…I know how to do that I’ll let him buy my dinnner on monday …see yer bitch I know how to win a man….ha ha ha
Such a tart….. 🙄
😉
Isn’t she just !!! xx
Shouldn’t you be buying him dinner if you want him on your side, you know what he’s trained up for…..you wont get within 6ft of me, I’m safe !!. I await with anticipation as to how your going to win him from me……..why go out for offal when you got steak at home
ooooooooooooooh star,you have a body guard,ooooooooh who trained him?what is he trained in?apart from protecting you!!!did you find him on preloved?……how can you make your self safe star?you can’t be on the look out 24/7.and your booby guard must sleep?…..i do hope you have seperate rooms star,?…..steak?….offal?…ask him iff he like’s a bit of Rump????,lol,how tall is he?…..lol.
Better pack your water wings, star!!!! lol
Naah Polly, Tarts all talk…..she doesn’t scare me. xx
This if fun!!! Looking forward to the next instalment …and you are SO brave Star…lol xxx
damn star l wish l could afford you lol xx