Man at large

Responses

1. 

   Andreas February 9, 2026

   Well I think that’s great! If I was in this position and I hope one day I will be, I’d do both. It’s a sure bet, that you’ll get lucky one way or the other!

2. 

   dj February 10, 2026

   Everything is down to degrees. By and large these days it’s less acceptable to ‘ogle’ (at least obviously so) compared to decades ago when it was sometimes even appreciated. I’m sure I’m right when I say that most people of all ages and all genders (and all sexual orientations) might ‘ogle’ a very attractive person who takes their fancy, but to how much of a degree they do it or make it obvious will determine whether it is harmless and relatively innocent, or uncomfortable for the other person or even inappropriate. It’s also sometimes difficult to make this determination if you are the person doing the ‘ogling’ especially having lived through decades where it wasn’t at all unacceptable before. I do engage in people watching, usually with a pint in one hand, and as different people move in and out of the pub, heads turn and look for different reasons and sometimes in an appreciative way, from all genders. I remember one occasion when there were around a dozen small tables arranged in two rows of six, and at each table were male patrons having drinks – including me. All of a sudden a slim attractive young lady wafted in, walked right down the middle of all the tables, wiggling her hips and strutting as though she was on a catwalk, her dress flowing and flapping, and then she turned around and walked right back past again exaggerating each step and movement knowing that all eyes were on her as all conversation had stopped, and then she wafted back out of the pub again. All us guys looked at each other in utter disbelief. She knew what she was doing alright!!

   1. 

      roseinbloom February 12, 2026

      dj, Your first words tell the whole story and everything else explains it. It should be by degrees.

3. 

   roseinbloom February 12, 2026

   I like honesty and find it interesting and informative. In your situation, you are lucky to have your daughter spend time with you and paying too little attention to your people you are with is not a good idea.. You are older but not dead but your sounds out of place and rude. .. I take my young people to meals and I pay, but I don’t allow cell phones and none of them have ogled anyone. We all try to enjoy ourselves with each other.
   I was raised that way; obvious sexuality within families was taboo. I was a young waitress and was not ogled by anyone enough to notice. I am sure that many lusted in their hearts. My mind was totally on my service and job. I did make very good tips and waitressing was a summer job and I needed money for a down payment on a home. I was a teacher during the year. . Times change, but human nature doesn’t change so much and overt sexuality in a family is not done and is not a good idea. You are with a group and that group is the one that should be your focus but grandfathers and ogling is probably very inappropriate to all parties. Each time you see your family may be your last so count yourself blessed and appreciate them because I am sure their time could be spent in many other ways, so make it better for everyone.

4. 

   lefthanded February 20, 2026

   I’m 74, and while I might not actually “ogle”, I still cannot help noticing an attractive woman (of any age). I don’t see any harm in it – in fact I think it’s quite normal as long as you don’t say or do anything which might be considered intrusive.