Just say Hello
Stop saying, Hi how are you?, or hows things? Or Hows your day? Unless you really want to know, and have time, empathy, heart and head space to do justice to some tortured souls reply.
Probably many times in my life I have found these inane greetings annoying. But twice in my life. One of them now. They render me, speechless, near hysterical, furious. Often with a totally well meaning but at best thoughtless stranger. It can sabotage my whole day. Could also leave you stunned by a seemingly ridiculous over reaction, over sharing.
Many of us are struggling with some huge stuff.
So please just say hello or smile and walk on by.
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From experience, most dont want to know. But they no longer ask me. I’d rather that opposed to them asking and not caring at all.
Absolutely ❤️
I will ALWAY’S respond to a genuine ‘tortured soul’ but how many actually ARE ! 🤔 Also, I never give out any advice unless asked, then I’d do my very best to help.
You are one special lady. There are lots of good people out there. Im just trying to draw attention to the thoughtless, throw away, casual, incorrect use of our methods of greeting. Just say hello dont trigger unnecessary/unwanted conversation.
Absolutely!
It can be a vey misused term. When I ask that I genuinely mean it but I often find I get a short curt response, as if people really don’t want to say, which is fine of course. What I absolutely can’t stand is when people ask me how I am when in fact all they are doing is preempting a way to tell you all about their woes instead. So my answer to the question might be “I’m fine thanks” and immediately they will respond by launching into a never ending tirade of everything that’s wrong with their day, their life and other people’s – even though I hadn’t actually asked. There are times therefore when I literally dread being asked that question “How are you?” because I know what will follow. Sorry @tjay I seem to have gone into a rant here. Wasn’t my intention, and have I know done exactly what I said I hate happening to me? Have I? Oh Gawd… I should give myself a good talking to instead…
Yeah to be honest, I just love a good rant. Im trying to cut people off now. ‘You really don’t want to know’ usually does it. But if Im feeling humerous I might try ‘Sorry but if I told you that you that you would need antidepressants’
That’s a good response. Genuinely needing to offload is also fine of course. I’d just rather people be honest about it and say “I need to get some of this out of my head, can I have a rant?” or anyting at all similar to that rather than to ask me how I am with no real purpose in mind other than to allow them to automatically offload instead.
Hmm, not sure this is for me, I was merely hoping to connect to someone, anyone, for the sheer joy of a simply smile, meaning how is your day going, not to solve world problems or attitudes.
Yep…I don’t care if they don’t want to truly know how I feel. I wd rather know that they are well and dealing with whatever is on their mind. Better to give than recieve.