THE ART OF LISTENING

I was taught to listen in my very early teens. I was taught by a highlander. A woodsman. A stalker. Not of people, but of animals.

He taught me the value of stillness and silence. Of listening to the woods or moorland or wherever we were. He taught me to notice not only what was there, but what was not. Be they sounds or observed items, or their absence.

It didn’t take me long to realise that those learned skills work, not only in the wild places, but with humans in an urban setting or a room.

Later in my life I refined those skills under expert tutelage. I learned to pick up on small things said or not said. On facial expressions, body language, on fear or confidence.

I also learned that the same acquired skills can be applied to written statements, especially those made on the spur of the moment. Statements written when the emotion of the moment takes over, controls the thoughts.

When I first came to this chat site I was unsure, nervous and , this being my very first experience of any chat room, a little afraid of what I would find.

I was lucky. Lucky on two counts. First I had happened on a good, secure, safe site. Second, I found someone to lead me through the initial pitfalls and problems of setting up and settling into a chat room (Thanks Pat. I’ll never forget your help, or your Dave. Christ you scared me with him for a few minutes).

It wasn’t long before I realised that old skills could be used in the chat room too.

Several old skills served me well. The ability to hide in plain site for one. So the persona of court jester came easily. The jester is usually accepted without too much question.

As time went on I listened to conversations, contributing from the side-lines more often than not, and realised that things were said, or not said. That I could, for the most part, pick up on that.

I am not claiming to be any psychologist. My training was never in that direction, but if you listen then you hear the flows and ebs.

So to the point of this blog.

Let me quote from an old TV series. “We have two ears, but only one mouth, therefore we should listen twice as much as we shout.”

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Responses

  1. Brilliant advice Way……….the unspoken word speaks volumes…………..statements written and spoken when the emotions take over………….hands up………i am guilty of that, acting on impulse, yes a big failing of mine………..but i am working on it……….lol xx

    1. Funny thing is Way, that as I have come to know you, it is not the “court jester” you oft speak of. Yes, you have that great, dry wit that I love. More..it is the person I have come to know, the unquestionable integrity, the values, all that makes the You I know and respect.
      Gawd, I am sorry, did it again…lol. Not likin’ this…are ya? haha

  2. way very true m8 forr when i joined chat at around the same time waz met by pat to . wouldd also like to add tthat the stillness of the mind can alsso bring clear sight and thought and thought in the right way travels further than the spoken word to that end we tend to read between the lines with wat we see in print

  3. As John Wayne said in Big Jake. Your long on mouth and short on ears.
    I wish more people in life would listen. Have you ever had one of those times on site when nobody says anything for 30 secs or so. It feels like forever and all are listening. Spooky. xxxxx