Resolution: Happy in 2018

I finally made a resolution to be happy in the coming year. That is what it is all about. I don’t know how many years I have left but in the coming year I will think more about being happy. What makes me happy and what make you happy is something we need to think about. Maybe there are some who are as happy as they can be and they could share what works for them, but many of us are not so happy as all that and we could do a better job of being HAPPY.

Most of us have limited resources and other issues and we have a lot of negativity to overcome, but in spite of all that we could try to maximize our opportunities to enjoy ourselves. There is an expression, “Eat, drink, and be merry”, well, we are missing the “MERRY’ part. If you like to sing, sing more, if you like to dance, dance more, if you like to walk or run, do it more. Those are free and available to all except the people who are incapacitated. So, enjoy what you have, there are people with less and many manage to be happier than some others.

Gratitude plays a big part in being happier; using and appreciating what you have is what we have to do. When we were younger we could look forward to bigger and better and more, but that is very unlikely now, though we could play the lottery if that would help to make us happy. Indulgences are fun, but over-indulgences will destroy any happiness so learning to live within our limitations may be what is necessary for happiness. What is left?

I still will resolve to be happier in 2018. I love to make my family and friends happy. I am lucky that way so I can do more of it. I have learned that moving more makes me feel better and gives me more capacity to do what makes me happy, so I need to do more to be happier. I have also learned that the nicer I am to people, the nicer they are to me; that doesn’t mean that I will give all that I have to needy people but it does mean that I will try not to needlessly cause grief to others and that if a kind word will help; I will hope to find a kind word and say it.

Some believe in Karma, I don’t.  I do believe that many things have a BOOMERANG effect. What you throw out there comes back at you. Anyone who wants to be happy will avoid doing anything bad that will come back at them. I am lucky in that I never had deep stores of anger or resentment and I never thought that being hateful or spiteful in word or deed would make me happier. I live in a free country and I figured that I was entitled to the “pursuit of happiness” and I still think it is my job to make me happy. I don’t expect Santa Clause to make a miracle or me each year. I don’t get angry at others for not making me happy, so I don’t need to be angry and revengeful.

What makes me happy may be very different from what makes you happy, but gratitude, sensible habits, and kindness and respect for others seems to be a part of what makes us all happy. I will try to wake up every day with the thought of what would make me happy that day, knowing that it is not always easy. I am not happy in dirt or clutter and I like good food and I am capable of cleaning and cooking so some of that has to get done, but I do have a lot of time left and so I have a big job to do things that will make me happy and most of it all comes down to making better choices and getting the necessary things  done and separated from my free time to spend as I choose. Happiness is also a state of mind and so I need to keep my mind in a state of positivity and focus which isn’t easy. I still resolve to be happier this year and I need hope and optimism which will be a challenge for me in my country.  I will need a strong resolve to stay focused on being optimistic and happy in the coming year. 

Being happy is something that cannot be taught and you have to look deep inside to figure it out for yourself. Waiting for the next life does not work for me and I don’t see it working for anybody that I know. I have noticed that some people who are the happiest love to work, I like work less every year so maybe you can see that being happy is not easy for me when I know that the process has many challenges.

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Responses

  1. Dear Rose, you’ve already began your resolution just by posting this insightful, wonderful blog. Thank you for your thoughts. I’m sure others will feel uplifted and reassured that one’s personal pursuit of happiness isn’t wrong or, too late to enjoy.
    Have a happy New Year!
    K.

    1. Me.K. Thank you for being so positive and kind. I wrote in a hurry because people just have not been blogging. I know some are busy. Best wishes form health and happiness and prosperity in the coming year

  2. You have wonderful ideas how to help those in need in the coming year. This coming year I will try to do better in helping the needy. We give 2 tons of vegs, 1,000 lbs of beef and 200 dz eggs away free to everyone in need. I pray this next year we can even do better sharing our produce from the farm. Len Granger

  3. Thankyou Rose for an enlightening blog, gave me food for thought. I live alone, suffer depression so don’t get to be as sociable as I might. I struggle sometimes with things such as communicating on the internet, facebook etc. would be handy if someone was around to bounce ideas, knowhow, off of. Anyway, good luck to you and all senior chatters for 2018, here’s to a happier year. Percy 🙂

  4. Hello Rose, realistically the chances are we are not going to be happy 24/7…….but I did read recently that when we wake in the morning we can make a decision to be happy on that day at least, it is a state of mind, unless of course you have real worries which cannot be solved that easily ……..well I have realised what would make me happier and that is regular female company, women’s chat and all that, so I have taken steps to resolve that and I am joining a craft group in the New Year, hopefully this will lead to spin off events……..I am going to resume my Sat morning painting………getting back into healthy eating’s habits again, this certainly raises my spirits by making me feel healthier and back in charge…….so those are not resolutions for me but doable goals…….fingers crossed they will pay off……..Happy New Year to you Rose………Good Luck with your resolves……

    1. Rose, I think the “boomerang effect” you spoke of regarding the consequences of our behaviors in personal relationships is, at least, a practical aspect of Karma. You frequently hear people say, “what goes around comes around”. Whether one believes that Karma applies on a cosmic or spiritual level would depend upon one’s religious beliefs. Most Hindus belief that it does.
      When it comes to being happy, I would again think another catch phrase often applies, “attitude is everything”. If we are prone to pessimism, blaming others, and feeling persecuted, and see things in a negative light instead of within the spectrum of the normal ups and downs of daily life, then we have trouble maintaining happiness.
      If “attitude is everything”, then frequent “attitude adjustments” may be required to be happy. In jest, I suggest the following remedy complements of the Scottish comedian, Bill Connally – “Life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life. Get wasted all the time, and you’ll have the time of your life!”

    2. Thank you Sir perceivable and I am sorry that you are depressed. I think many of us have our sad times or depressed times. I know I have and I fight it every day to stay upbeat and positive. Exercise is good, but you may need to struggle to get up and move, but struggle you must. I am reading a book about HABITS which you learn to do a habit and then reward yourself until it becomes a habit. Your mind needs to focus. Put on the clothes or shoes, clothing, exercise, then reward. You can post on health and fitness group. Percy, please post on the group, Health and Fitness.
      You can send me a message also. You may need to become my friend so send me a Friend request .

    3. Starlette, Best wishes for a good year in every way in 2018. I hope we can be better friends, we are very compatible women. I hope more of us will start posting our struggles on the Health and fitness group. I had health some scary health issues, and I guess I still do but I have few restrictions and I am going to the gym three times a week at least.
      My goal is to make positive gains as soon as I can. I want to be stronger, more toned, and lose a few pounds.
      I want to be more active in more ways. I am working on building good habits. I am reading a book on Habits.
      Good luck Star, and it would be fun if we could share our struggles and progress.

    1. Bubbylove, Thank you so much. If I can cheer one person or give one person strength and support, my effort is worthwhile. I know how men seem to “want you home” even though they may ignore you while you are there. I am sorry that you had a close call. I know several women whose husbands “want them home”.
      It is good for you to workout and you are lucky to “love it” so you just NEED to do it. You need to do what you like without feeling guilty. Life is short. Get over guilt, you are doing nothing wrong.

  5. Rose you are so insightful and [positive. Thank you!!! I want to start taking care of me and not allowing my hubby’s needs to control me. I love working out but don’t because he wants me home, but I can control only the things that I do….. and I will work out more, volunteer with my church on a more routine manner and get involved with my community. These are all things I love and I stopped, granted I almost died but God gave me another chance and I am going to take advantage of everyday that I have left. Because when I love me more I can love my husband even more.

    1. Bubbylove, Thank you so much. If I can cheer one person or give one person strength and support, my effort is worthwhile. I know how men seem to “want you home” even though they may ignore you while you are there. I am sorry that you had a close call. I know several women whose husbands “want them home”.
      It is good for you to workout and you are lucky to “love it” so you just NEED to do it. You need to do what you like without feeling guilty. Life is short. Get over guilt, you are doing nothing wrong.

  6. Happiness. I live in Chile…fairly modestly….very modestly compared to UK expectations.
    In a world obsessed by consumerism and every year more self-centred, there is something to be said for appreciating what you have and the things around you.
    Into this poor country many from even poorer, much poorer countries are arriving. Happiness is seeing the enormous smile on the face of a local council gardener from Haiti when you say good morning as you pass because in his country everyone greets neighbours but not so here.
    Happiness is joining in the joy of the birds in the garden as they sing in the new day.
    Happiness is the attitude you have in everything you do. Remember “whistle why you work”. There are unpaid people who survive by recycling household rubbish. They are called “cartoneros”, carboard people,. On rubbish collection days they pass by on bicycles fitted with huge boxes and collect anything interesting you have left outside: paper, bottles, old clothes, broken equipment. The woman who collects in my street sings as she cycles whether it is raining, zero degrees or 35 degrees. She always says hello, chats a little and her smile is contagious. Some people don’t have time to think about happiness; they just live it.

    1. Your post brought back a memory from my youth in the 1940’s where we had an old man with a horse and wagon who roamed the streets singing ” throw out your rags, paper, clothing, etc. etc,”. Naturally he was known a “Singing Sam the rag man” and I’d bet most any people living in my home town who have reached a ripe old age remember that man. One of the nice things I remember from a long time past. Thanks for a nice remembrance.

      1. Lonerogue, I am happy to have brought back a nice memory for you. I had a peddler who went down the alley shouting, The housewives did not drive and stayed home during the day. The ice cream man was great fun also.

  7. brenda, I appreciate your sharing your story, but many people are unhappy and clinically depressed even though they have everything they need and more. In this country, there is a whole lot f depression and the pain is real. Sometimes sadness or depression be hormonal or chemical, but the pain of sadness and depression is real, disabling and sometimes fatal so it needs understanding and ways to cope.
    I do find your story enlightening and it proves that happiness is not always having a lot of material goods.
    If we have everything we need then we need to change our attitude or way of life to feel better.
    You are right, appreciating what we have is more important than having a lot.

    1. At time in my past I have thought that the bad stuff that happened to me and my family were just things that do happen to people in general. No reason at all that they should not happen to me. Some of the nice things that have happened were denied to some other too, I’m sure.

  8. Rose, i enjoyed your blog. I wish you a Happy New Year filled with positive thoughts to make your days brighter. I try to enjoy each and every day now and try to make my days happy ones. I nearly died few years ago during surgery and now i praise God for every day he gives me. I was down and out for awhile but then i decided to do things to make my days more enjoyable, as you have decided to do. One does feel much better when they can smile at the end of the day. Oh, i get those terrible aches n pains from arthritis, but im not going to let it ruin my days. i’m still going to do things that make my days brighter. Good luck with your positive thinking, it can go a long way to that smile at the end of the day, and a feeling of happiness. Hugs, Dianne67

  9. Diane, I am glad that you liked the blog and I am glad you survived. Being positive takes a focus and determination. I am focusing on what I can do to make my life and the life of others better. I am not wasting my energy on negative thought about concern that is mostly beyond my control It takes work to stay positive.
    I have arthritis, and it is hard to live with pain and be cheerful. Maybe some exercise or medication could help. One choice is to live with a situation, but to always seek a remedy. I have had arthritis issues since I was 30. I am still about the same as I was.
    There are many different kinds of arthritis, so I am not suggesting what will help you, but you can experiment and talk to others. Hug’s to you Diane.

  10. You get what you give. I find helping others helps me. Stepping outside of myself to do that takes the focus off of me. I had a job for 30 years dealing with the public. I found that with starting each day with a prayer and a positive attitude helped me deal with the people I dealt with. They could hear it thru my voice. I find I don’t see life , happiness or joy as a job or stressful. Just giving to others and it will be returned to you 3 fold or more.

  11. CWSweet, You have a great philosophy, but I have given to people and laughed at because I was suckered. Some people get their kicks this way. Most people don’t, and the ones that do have warped personalities and/or are just very sad, needy people.

    1. Those are the people I don’t allow into my life. I give everyone the benefit of the doubt but if they continue to be buttheads, I don’t let them ‘get’ me. I grew up wanting everyone to like me but as I grew older I realize that isn’t all there is to happiness.