monsters under the bed

as a child we all belived there where monsters under the bed, in the cupboard or behind the curtains as soon as it was bed time,when we grow up those monsters for most of us disappear, mine didn’t they were hidden in a box burried deep in my subcousius mind, they would raise there ugly head every so often to be pushed back in, 18 months ago i was living with what i thought was a v good friend i thought he was gay, i had know him for 10 yrs we bought a house together he had v little family, my family took him in to their hearts, then 18 months ago at 7.30 the police arrived on my door step arrested him searched the house, he was a pedofile, my world fell apart, along with me, i left the house moved it with friend, went court saw him plead guilty and not look sorry, i am the eldest of 6 children all my brother and sisiter have kids of different ages, i have grand children, he has been around (not alone) my family, i am on anti deresants still i see a counciller every week, and the monsters have come out of the box,
but as they say after the rain look for a rainbow, when its dark look for stars
i have faced my monsters i was abused as a child, i am no longer scared of them i won,
i have bought a boat where i have peace and a sactury
i have found in trevor my boyfriend of 3 yrs a wonderful man with love and patience enough to hold me through the darkest times and i love dearly
my daughter who was living with me and 2 grand daughters has be re housed in a lovey home with big garden
the boat has bought me closer to my sisiter and brother as we have shared trips together
i know there is light at the end of my tunnel and i will reach it soon