I’m glad I’m a woman!!!!
I’m glad I’m a woman, yes I am, yes I am.
I don’t live off of Budweiser, Beer Nuts and Spam.
I don’t brag to my buddies about my erections.
I won’t drive to Hell before I ask for directions.
I don’t get wasted at parties, and act like a clown.
And I know how to put that damned toilet seat down!
I won’t grab your hooters, I won’t pinch your butt.
My belt buckle’s not hidden beneath my beer gut.
And I don’t go around “re-adjusting” my crotch,
or yell like Tarzan when my headboard gets a notch.
I don’t belch in public, I don’t scratch my behind.
I’m a woman you see-I’m just not that kind!
I’m glad I’m a woman, I’m so glad I could sing.
I don’t have body hair like shag carpeting.
It doesn’t grow from my ears or cover my back.
When I lean over you can’t see 3 inches of crack.
And what’s on my head doesn’t leave with my comb.
I’ll never buy a toupee to cover my dome.
Or have a few hairs pulled from over the side.
I’m a woman, you know-I’ve got far too much pride!
And I honestly think its a privilege for me,
To have these two boobs and to squat when I pee.
I don’t live to play golf and shoot basketball.
I don’t swagger and spit like a Neanderthal.
I won’t tell you my wife just does not understand,
Or stick my hand in my pocket to hide that gold band.
Or tell you a story to make you sigh and weep,
Then screw you, roll over and fall sound asleep!
Yes, I’m so very glad I’m a woman, you see.
Forget all about that old penis envy.
I don’t long for male bonding, I don’t cruise for chicks
Join the Hair Club For Men, or think with my dick.
I’m a woman by chance and I’m thankful, it’s true. !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Recommend0 recommendationsPublished in Senior Chatters
Pollie, I really liked this piece I am glad I am a woman. Marie
Yes very nice but I an glad I am a man,old and used but still happy!!
thanks for comments uston and marie. appreciate you reading. i’m glad you are a man too uston!!!
Very good Pollie I’m glad I’m a women too,but then it is nice to have those men around as well,they do have something nice ,give good cuddles don’t they?
I am still glad to be a man!! I am glad you a woman, I would hate to kiss me. I am glad you a woman cos I surly wouldn’t pinch my own butt. :O:O:O
very funny pols!! you must be run of your feet blogs in here and on the old one keeping everyone laughing!!
thanks for comments macathy( i agree with you on the cuddles bit lol!!!,) j-smile,( I’m glad your a man too, and i would kiss ya and pinch your butt if i was allowed that is haha!!!) and jcb( yes i am worn out haha!!!!) appreciate you all reading thanks again…
Yes, I’m glad I’m a woman, too, but men are OK. Men are good for a couple of things, moving heavy furniture, and so on. (haaa-ha,ha).
Not all of us men belch, show 3 inches of but crack, shout “wooo hoo” when we’ve seduced a woman.
Some of us have just a little more class than that.
Not many I grant and not me……….but there are some……somwhere, lol
Hahahahaha pollie, my first laugh of the day xxxx
Thanks Pollie, loved the poem!
thanks for the poem,I lost my husband recently but had to laught,also new toS C found it helps a lot
I like it very much Pollie, though little bold by the Indian standards !
With best wishes and regards.