If wishes were horses and I owned the SC Chat- rooms

If wishes were horses and I owned the SC Chat- rooms

Yes,I know though,
If wishes were horses, Beggars would ride.
(If turnips were bayonets, I would wear one by my side)

Supposing if the wishes were really horses and if I happened to own the site, I shall ensure that:
1] Everyone shall be the real he or she. No nicknames will be allowed.
2] Real life names, real snaps too! We do not run dating chat rooms.
3] Shall encourage Private chatting with strict rules for punishment of people who cross the limits of decency. Let the birds of same feathers fly together.
4] Everyone shall be requested and even encouraged to come on cam, with certain notified exceptions. We must see the person while he or she chats. It helps to build better relationships and understanding.
4] While chatter is back from holiday, we shall request him or her to bring a short video of his trip and arrange to have his trip covered by screening it during the course of chatting, so that others can enjoy the virtual tour, with his permission.
5] We will discuss on all major mishaps, major accidents and calamities happening anywhere in the world and pass out a report on it and get it published on our site and also at other places with the help of the chatters from that country.
6] We shall encourage philanthropic work, for alleviation of the human grief and sorrow all over the globe by the members in whatever way possible.
6] Any undignified banter, sarcasm, or hateful or racial remark made on purpose will be treated with a strong warning. 3 of them in a year will bar the member from the membership.
Will encourage the members to not only report against the horrible chatters but collectively bar them immediately by muting.
Any additions, deletions, applauses or shortcomings, please shoot !

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Published in Senior Chatters


  1. Faye

    In reply to your Blog Abhilaaj ….
    1. It is recommended in many places that no real names are used for our own protection.
    2. No we dont run a dating site but there are some who think that is what this is and even after being told differently still treat it as such. As for the real pics…many do prefer to keep a little of themselves secret and only reveal the ‘real’ them to certain friends.
    3. Decency….who decides on this. After all there are some in private chat who like to be a little more risque than others…plus it is private chat…no-one else sees it.
    4 Now thats a bit much. What if a person is off to a nudist camp for a holiday? Pics….they are private and only for show if they wish.
    and 4 again….Tried the webcam on here. Too many shy people about. And I got the two 4’s around the wrong way…:-(
    5. Its a happy place where we want to forget all the mishaps in the world…LOL
    6. Too many big words for me so nothing on this one…:-)
    6 again . This one is already here although maybe not in such an extreme form. Those breaking the rules of decency, hurtful etc remarks dont get a year to sort themselves out.

    You have some intriguing ideas. Not sure all them would fit onto a friendship site though. Gave me a bit of a giggle to read it though…..:-)

  2. nmod

    Well ,aren’t we lucky that wishes aren’t horses ,then ? , I think that …if wishes were horses and you owned the site …the good think about it would be that beggars could ride ! Lol

  3. grandmaj

    no offense but thank goodness you don’t own the site lol The reason I like this site is because I have freedom not to be putting up my photo or having webcam. For my own personal reasons. Another thing good for this site is the nick names. If people wish to reveal their real names its up to the said person. I have been on here for a lot of years and no one has worried that I don’t have my real name or my photo. And I still seem to be able to have a lot of people I chat to. There is enough weirdos sneaking in without them knowing my real name and seeing my photo. The admin are great but they cant be on here 24/7 and catch them immediately. Have you ever known anyone that has had their identity stolen?? Its easy to do if you have the information, which I am not prepared to be putting on here. Best to be safe than sorry… Signed Grandmaj…….my real name lol

  4. lani36

    Quite a few of the titems you mention already happen , if there’s a catastrophe in our Countries , such as cyclones , storms, earthquakes and such are discussed here , As for CAMERAS, a very bad idea,,, citing civil liberties….
    No de plumes are a self protective device allowing Chatters to be selective in who.m they choose to give there real identity too, another civil right …..
    If Chatters overthrow the bounds of decency and respect already are monitered and asked to leave or are banned by Administraters…
    I have never met so many kind and caring people as we have here on Chatters, when anyone of us has a problem and cares to share it , so many come in and voice their sympathy and care….
    So I hate to play devils advocate , but i think if you are here a little longer you may see and experience the kindness and care i have since being a member of Chatters ,,,
    No changes please….
    If it’s not broken it doesn’t need fixing……Lani xxx.

    1. cappy123

      Yep…I agree, Lani….am a free member at the moment…..will sign up again when I got more time on my hands to chat more – and that will be during winter time – coming round soon for moi. I pop in now and then to check blogs and this one is quite interesting! Anyway…. to cut a long story short…SC is great… I’ve made good buddies and it’s a nice way of ‘escaping’ the real world once in a while. 🙂 Am not quite sure why you’d want your own site, Adhilaaj…..not happy here?!?!

      The mind boggles……………………..

      1. lani36

        I agree Cappy, but i also agree that abs has the right to speak his min d another civil liberty lolx

  5. macathy

    Just wondering if you ever entered the chat room,to see what is discussed and how people care for others on here. I don’t like cams in chat rooms get enough people trying whispering stuff I am not interested in as it is now. Glad Rob owns this site as it suites me fine it’s great site happy to have paid my money to belong ,Have You????

  6. Abhilaaj Post author

    Let me state (with greetings and thanks to all for their comments) that I happened to come across 2 to 3 blogs randomly published on the site which spoke of the experiences of some of the people like me who were rather saddened about certain aspects of the chat rooms.
    The main complaint was regarding insensitivity of some of the chatters to others .
    One of the chattering lady as per the blog carried in April 2014 (if I recollect correctly) who was in some sort of trouble was not allowed to state her plight and was admonished. That blog carried about 23 comments.
    Another blog was by a gentleman who did not wish to continue because of some rash remarks made by someone.
    My own blog was carried on 4 the March 2015 entitled “My experience as a chatter on the SC ”,which is available even now on the site for reference.
    In my blog, I have stated as below:
    “Unfortunately, I had also to listen to a comment like “Send us the snaps showing how things can be well in India, we will have a long chat on this for a week, Ha, ha, ha (repeated many times)!
    {When asked by the chatter: “How are things in India?, I replied : “Good enough!” To this the above remarks with a Ha, ha was made.}
    At another point my comment that “Only the God is perfect, men are not”, was termed as the “outpourings of yet another religious pervert!”
    The present blog was written in the above perspective.
    The remaining suggestions made are put up to a initiate a healthy debate.
    The sole purpose of the exercise is to turn the place still better. That is all.
    No offence meant.

    1. nmod

      No, offense taken !!
      I’m appalled to hear the reaction you had in the chat room about India , but I’m not surprised ,because unfortunately we only hear bad news about the world around us !
      Movies like ” slum dog millionaire ” didn’t make your country any favors !
      I remember to have been left disturbed for a whole week after leaving the cinema on the day I saw it ! .
      India seems to be a country of extremes contrasts and lots of people I know
      Loved it there !
      Perhaps you could start a group ” greetings from India ” or something like that ,where you could post positive info about your country .
      And people who have visited could also post things about India .
      I would be very interested to read about it !
      I’m sorry to see that you get some negative comments to some of your posts , but I think they are mainly because of the cultural differences and lack of information about your country .
      I admire your perseverance !

  7. dinny

    To this blog I am going to make a comment, I love SC have been a member for a few years, I also have met and am friends with a lot of people, Rob does a fantastic job and I like the way the site is run. to me the site is an escape from reality, I log in most mornings, read shout, check out new members and who else is on. check my groups and comment if I feel like it.
    I like my privacy therefore no photo and I totally disagree with items 1, 2, and both 4’s. By the time I finish with SC I am ready to face the day (and my polished nails will be dry) If I am lonely at night, I log on again just to pass the time.

  8. roseinbloom

    abhilaaj, You make a lot f good points and it would help all of us to think what we would do if we owned the site. As you can see, you get a lot of negativity. I and we scream like heck when the owner makes changes. More later.

  9. Slimjim

    To me S C is many things. it is a place to come most nights and chat to people from all over the world and hear their news I am still amazed by the fact that this can be done on the click of a button Some members tend to go way over the top with there views on just about any thing. Lets just keep it light easy and friendly to all members whether we have been here for years or are Newbies.

    1. roseinbloom

      slimjim. It takes all kinds. Some people wanted chat to be lighter, and so wehave a “giggle room” and a “think tank room”. It seems that the more rooms we get the less any of the rooms are used. Changes need to come slowly.

  10. roseinbloom

    ABout Pics. We had a blog here recently and many people said they do not friend people who do not have a picture. Many of us do have pictures. Many do not.
    Abilaaj, youare a very intelligent educated person and there is no reason that you could not set up your own website for philanthropic purposesor any purpose that you wish. I enjoyed your suggestions. I do not think you meant for it to be considered as a serious need for changes.

  11. vonMichael

    I would like to call myself as a relatively new member on SC compared to
    others I would say.
    I would also say I’m not only glad but also very happy SC is not runed by
    you and I’ll give you reasons for that.

    A pic posted showing myself could also show my neighbours face which
    no one would know! So that proposal doesn’t make sense first.
    To see the pic of a person would also distroy my imagination of the person
    that stands behind the articles or comments posted.
    If you need a cam running while you are online you should try to skype I

    Not to discuss politics, religion and a few others topics means to avoid alehouse
    discussions on here.

    Out of my view there is absolutely no need for a change cos SC
    makes a great difference in a very positive way to other forums on the net.

    But two points which are important to me should be changed; poems, own
    articles, individual advertising for own brain work should be posted in the
    correct group as well as full sized pictures. They should be reduced in size just
    to express more quality and individuality.

  12. Abhilaaj Post author

    Unfortunately, It is rather getting a bit subjective ! It is just a debate and be taken in a lighter vein, I thought , as Rose said it above .

  13. roseinbloom

    I like your blog and I think we should all take more responsibility for what happens here. The owner really is available and listens to members. So, Abhilaaj, I and you should feel that we do own the site. Number 4 is listed twice. Most people don’t want to be seen, that is why they are on a chat site. When they are all dressed and looking good, they are up and around.
    The other 4 is a good idea, and many people share pics of travel and their home area in various places. I try to share geographic and cutural info because I love to hear and see other parts of the world.That is a big reason I am on an international chat site.
    I find it curious that you have no pic of yourself and it is true that doesn’t help in forming relationships.
    When people do become better friends, they share with more people in more ways.

  14. Jsmile

    Good blog Abhilaaj. I believe it is taken in light, just people contributing. That’s why Rob owns and runs the site because he knows how to keep the balance and growing. With technology these days one has to be very careful what they reveal on the web. I cannot confirm this but I read and heard from a local TV station there is a technology that allows a person to copy an image in the search just as you would type it in and “google image” can search said image. It was amazing what they found. Now that’s just too interesting. I do know our local law enforcement has such a technology similar to this. I see no real need to reveal too much. If people will not friend me because I don’t post pics so be it. I don’t provide one and do not require one. I see your point completely but respectfully disagree. Providing videos and photos from holiday trips? Not me sir lol. Your #6 reference would come soon enough with suggested reveal of personal info. I would like to ad one point you may or may not be aware of; there is really no such thing as “private” over the web. To you and the “private chatter” it may be private from the rest of the site but it can be retrieved with the proper skill and equipment. The computer and internet is an awesome piece of technology at one’s disposal. It can also be equally as damaging. Whenever you clear your history, it is cleared from your access but it is stored in your computer. Hence why when police investigate a crime the computer is the first thing seized. Private information is hacked 75% from technology people thought was safe. Anyway, I personally love the option we have here. Think how small the site would be if your suggestion was fulfilled. I doubt seriously it would even exist. You do contribute much to blogs. Some I get, some go right over my head but that’s ok. You do more than I and write better so keep up the good work and I’ll keep reading. “J”

  15. Abhilaaj Post author

    Thanks Rose, lani, jsmile, jsb1 , cappy 123, wamjad and others.
    Let me speak about the background under which this blog was written. The genre of the blog is humour.
    There is a famous bollywood movie called Nayak. (Taken from Wikipedia )
    In this movie the Riots cause deaths and destruction in Mumbai but the Chief Minister because of some political motive, does not take any preventive step. A TV reporter publicly brings to light the CM’s disregard towards the elimination of the violence.
    The CM, just to stick up for his political image, says to the reporter snapping his fingers,“ Become the CM just for a day ! “, something that later became a popular and theoretical political concept in India. The Reporter accepts the CM’s challenge and emerges as an efficient CM.
    So it was in that scenario that I chose to own the SC site, hypothetically.
    The idiom I chose (If wishes were horses …… ) also indicated that the blog was basically written in zest.
    This is precisely why I used the 2nd line of the idiom also “If turnips were bayonets, I would wear one by my side”
    Somehow, it was taken verbatim and has resulted in a downpour of comments much before the heavy mansoon could hit my terrace roof in July in Mumbai.
    Now, the basic objection is on why the identity of the chatters should be revealed, why they be requested to come on cam and why the private chats should be allowed. I do understand the sensitivities of the people on this. Points taken.
    The other issue was about sharing the holiday films. This was optional. The motive was to let others glimpse the spots. That is all. The films could just be of a building or a structure or flora and fauna sans the holidaymakers themselves.
    The comments which I have quoted in my earlier blog and which hurt me were about a chatter expressing surprise when I said being in India I was fine.
    This was sadism at its worst. It was like laughing and clapping over your neighbor’s house in flames over the smell of burning human flesh !
    The second comment was about I being called a religious pervert, on saying that it is only the God who is perfect . It was sacrilegious !
    There were about 10 people in the lobby at that time including an organizer , no one has so far responded or authenticated the incident so far !
    I hope I have made my stand clear enough.
    Rose madam has put it very well: “ I do not think you meant for it to be considered as a serious need for changes. Yes, she said it, right ! ” Just in zest .

  16. lani36

    Abbi the word is Jest not zest if i may be so bold to make a correction !comes fromthe latin …. ha ha ha this is written in jest ….
    Your blogs ar interesting keep them coming ….

  17. Abhilaaj Post author

    lani ! thank you so much.
    Yes, Zest is for enthusiasm or eagerness, ! Jest for something not seriously said , but intended as a joke.
    I do accept my mistake humbly and do appreciate your knowledge of Latin, too.
    Please do take the pains to point out all types of mistakes in my blogs.
    Thank you , also for liking my blogs.

  18. Sunnflower

    If you owned the site everyone would beggar off and you would be talking to yourself! Don’t try to fix what is not broken this site is a credit to Rob and his team! (In reply to beggars and horses) Cherie