Have Grief Without Grief Having You
I will be posting articles I have found to help members cope with a variety of issues. They are short articles that provide some help, but also open the opportunity to share what has helped you. I would like to focus on “ideas to help others”. thank you…. Linda
Have Grief Without Grief Having You | by Ian Lawton
Grief never fully leaves you. It just changes and you have to change with it. Anne Lamott said grief is “like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly—that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp.”
There are cold days when your grief feels arthritic. But there are also other, more limber days, when the spring in your step surprises you and there’s no shame in this. Dance with a limp, live with the pain and roll with the punches. What else can you do? Trust what the experience of millions has confirmed; that grief comes in waves and like a wave, grief does subside with time. When the wave of grief feels overwhelming, stay with it and remind yourself that “this too shall pass”.
Fight the waves, and you will exhaust yourself. Go with them, and they will subside more quickly and you will become stronger with every passing wave.
Nothing can be transformed until it is fully accepted. And then at some surprising moment you find yourself moving freely and look back to realize that the old grief has become too small for you. Not only are you ready to move on, but you realize you already have.
Grief is ONE part of your life, and even if it feels all consuming at times, you are more than your grief. Grief, like all e-motion is energy in motion. Its always moving. It doesn’t need to define you.
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After the grief of a divorce, something that helped me was to get on SC. Here I have found friends who gave me an ear while I cried. Gave me motivation such as I found in Living in the Moment. Slowly as I got involved, I found myself listening to others. There is such a mulitude of talents in here, I found what I needed from so many people. Now it is my turn to give back. I realized I had to go through the process of grieving, but I choose to not let it get the best of me. What has worked for you? xxoo Linda
I wrote. Anything and everything. Wherever my emotions took me at the time. As my grief faded my writing became less maudlin or dark. Before I knew it I was writing with hope, laughter, and joy once again. I obly knew I had to face my grief head on if I was ever going to function again. Love, Jackie xxxx
Great blog Linda xx
Jackie… great way to handle things. Having a journal allows you to say what you feel. So glad it helped you. I want to do an art journal now, it combines art with journaling. If I have a chance I may put something in one of the art groups. Blessings…. Linda
i wrote, i read, did community work as well as work, in short kept busy. After Dad died i found SC and walked into the arms of the most caring loving people. I always remember kindness and i like to give back so I stayed and do my best to give back.
This great blog linda and your intention to post articles to help members cope is a wonderful “give back”. Thank you xxx
I did anything and everything so as I didnt have time to think. I have a pressured job that kept me so busy, physically and mentally. and on my days off, i volunteered for anything going. I fought it, but it didnt help. It was a very long process to rid myself of hate, anger, self pity, shame, hurt, guilt, depression and hopelessness.
What helped me? A great deal of time, therapy and my dog Lucy 🙂
I will look forward to more posts from you Linda xx