FUNNY POEMS
I didn’t write these, but think they’re hilarious so I’m posting them here for everyone to enjoy.
TWO-LINE RHYME
THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE, AND
THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE:
My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you has screwed up my life.
I see your face when I am dreaming.
That’s why I always wake up screaming.
Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not.
Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
But I only slept with you ’cause I was pi*sed.
I thought that I could love no other
— that is until I met your brother.
Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl’s empty and so is your head.
I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don’t take that paper bag off your face.
I love your smile, your face, and your eyes
Damn, I’m good at telling lies!
My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe ‘Go to hell.’
What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime.
WHO SAID POETRY IS BORING
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Hi jojo, I have read about all your recent mishaps. I am glad that you are in good hands, doctors and especially our creator.
As for the poem, if I imagine Rodney Dangerfield reciting them, it does make it less offensive.
Take care.
From Rodney:
I was an ugly kid, I never had fun.
They took me to a dog show, and I won!
Hahahaha, Jo! …Very funny….Thanks for the laugh today, I needed it!
These are great jojo – laughed through the whole lot, and david’s as well. Glad you are back in full swing. Take care xoxoxox
how funny….
I liked the poems:)….am I allowed to write any of them to my friends :)))))
Hello jojo!
Haha. Passive aggressive much?