My favourite group, Runrig, wrote a song titled "Empty Glens" referring to the lack of people in the Scottish Highlands and islands. I use the title "Empty Room" to refer to the lack of people in the chat rooms on this site.

Time was you could turn up in the room at any time day or night (regardless of your time zone) and find someone to talk to. Not so now. Newbies are turning up. No welcome. No company. No assistance in navigating the site.

So what has changed? Yes the format changed a while back. No i didn't like it. No I wasn't the only one to complain, but a little perseverance and a look at the video guide (which I found excellent) and now? I quite like the new format.

So how do we get people back into the room? How do we get the friendly ethos (I hate that word) back?

I'd welcome suggestions.....and I suspect "the management" might too, because the Empty Room is a cold, cold place to be all on your own.

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Published in Senior Chatters


  1. Scorpio

    I felt I just had to make a comment on your blog way as I’ve been in the chat room seconds ago and once again found it empty. This happens very frequently at all times of the day and night. I wish I could think of any suggestions to fill the room but I’ve drawn a blank. New members don’t, it seems to me, stay long and we have the faithful few who keep going. It’s a shame we can’t seem to increase our chatting members as it is a really great site. I know this hasn’t helped much sorry for that.?

  2. grandmaj

    I think it helps if you go to the chat room and no one is there, if you wait for a while, as otherwise we just have people coming and looking and seeing no one and then leaving again. Maybe this will help, I dont know.

  3. Slimjim

    What can we do to increase the number of people in the chat room i was there this morning and there were two members present both female and both having been on the site for a few years and neither wanted to even say hello. I am also on another chat site and i am no sooner in the chat room than at least six members say HI or Welcome Good to see you . So what is the problem here. Clickiness perhaps talk only to certain people and ignore the rest including Newbies I am not surprised that so many do not stay. Rant Over

  4. Scorpio

    I can honestly say I’ve never experienced this slimjim. I always say hello when I enter the cr and have always been acknowledged. Many times I’ve been greeted as soon as I’ve entered. I really don’t think there are clicks there. Maybe you were just unlucky.

  5. jenna

    It is sad to see the lack of chatters in here, newbies won’t pay to stay.
    Sadly people will drift away as I did, I came back, but rarely find anyone in chat.
    I don’t know what the answer is to get it back to how it used to be.

  6. cefnrider

    The brutal truth is that there is no way to get it back to what it was because a lot of members left the site feeling dissatisfied or picked on by other members just because they held different views and if you dont believe check on how many paid members left in the last 2 years.
    Personally i can ignore anyone i dont like and still chat but a lot of people can,t.
    I rarely use the chat rooms anymore and I know when I do a certain members talks behind my back about me so who wants that ???
    What used to be a fantastic chat site with many views has become a closed clique for just a few

  7. Slimjim

    Hello Cef. We have both said more or less the same thing. I have been in the chat room with just 3 members present. All female and not one of them even returned so much as a hello. Yes the word clique describes things perfectly. As i have said on another site several members some i have never chatted to always say hello and i do the same What has happened to chatters in simple terms its lost that warm friendly feeling which sadly may never return

  8. ozzie59

    Okay…I will give you my 2 bobs worth….I have been a member of this site for about 5 years…when I joined it was full of people having a great time and a lot times there were so many people in chat that it was hard to get a word in..it was great and so many different people with different views etc…and then somewhere down the track things got a bit nasty and people were reporting people to admin and blah blah….peope getting banned for saying what they thought…so….if you cant say what you want in a chat room…whats the point? We all have different opinions on things…..just accept that….dont report people…we are seniors!! not children….if you dont like what someone says…..dont speak to them….this is all probably too late….all those great people are gone now…..
    thats my rant!

    1. roseinbloom

      ozzie, I think you got a big part of the problem. I felt safe here and now I feel that I could be thrown out and I am a rather prudish person, but yet people don’t always report correctly.

  9. dandelionsmiles04

    and here is my 2 cents, There is quite a distance between the owner’s philosophy and the chatters philosophy of what a good chatroom/site looks like. There is an obvious disconnect. There are clicks in chatroom. The clicks are a turn off for outsiders/newbies/seasoned chatters etc. …. because well,….you always feel like an outsider with or without the greetings. The back stabbings of chatters is another common practice that actually gets results…………………..chatters get banned. I believe chatters have more impact getting chatters kicked than they do in the “Look of the NEW Chat rooms. ( I believe about four new versions since I started) These are some of the problems I have witnessed on this site. I have been forced to look at other sites just to chat. This chatroom is usually always empty. I do not care for the other site as much but they do provide chat that this site lacks. I believe understanding the PROBLEMS is the only way to fix it. Dande

    1. Slimjim

      dande most of us share your opinions sadly none of us have the answers i use another site also and it can be vibrant especially at night Great chat and no back stabbing

  10. macathy

    We used to have an understanding on chat don’t talk about people if they aren’t there to defend themselves.I know lots say oh we were saying nice things ,but then it’s get to other kind of chat,till your talking behind their backs being nasty.I think it’s this that has killed the chat on this site,back stabbing ,I know I used to chat in pm till I got sick of being asked what was going on and I always said” I know nothing about other people, and I don’t talk about others”.
    I have been sick a lot this Year so have not been a regular on chat as I used to be. would like to get back chatting as I miss it .thats my say about things too.

  11. Suzan1957

    Okay, my turn. I too remember the days that no matter what time of day or night I came to chat, there was always a room of people (at least 5-6). But, that was about 2-3 years ago. Chatters have decreased because of all the rules and regulations we have to follow In order to chat. I agree with ozzie59 about what’s the point in coming into chat if you can’t chat about what you want to. We are adults, much less seniors. Things fell apart on Senior Chatters when the other rooms were taken away so as to bring all chatters together in one big Community room. That way no chatter would get their feelings hurt when other chatters would go to another room to chat. Many felt different clicks were talking about each other in the chat rooms. When the truth of the matter, in most cases, was chatters just chatting. People form bonds and friendships here and yes clicks are formed. You like to chat about the same things, have interest in common. So yes, you like some chatters and some you don’t, so what. Everyone needs to put their big boy pants on and be an adult and don’t sweat the small stuff. And I’ll tell you a secret, it’s all small stuff.

    1. Faye

      Suzan I will make 2 points here….1….Despite their names there are other rooms still available that can be used for chatting if people wish to do so. and 2..If I remember correctly there has been one rule added that is not included in the Terms & Conditions…that is the ruling about keeping things in the chatroom area on a positive note. Any other ruling that may have been added due to additions to the site is above those additions and in plain sight for everyone to see…ie above Info Box and the Chatroom.

        1. Faye

          True Way, I must agree with you but why in a public arena. Would people feeling that way not be better talking to a friend privately or even in one of the Groups if they want to gauge everyone elses thoughts on what is troubling them. There was a specific group made at one stage but unsure what happened to it…it wasnt used anyway…LOL

          1. Suzan1957

            Faye, some chatters do not have friends outside of the chatroom. And, we all know that it takes awhile to be able to call another chatter a “friend” . So they have no other outlet to vent or share their troubles than in chat. I don’t mind listening to what some call “negative” chat or chat that is troubling because it usually humbles me and makes me thankful for the blessings in my life.

        2. Faye

          Also true Way…but it does mean that anyone else in chatroom has to” listen” to these negative comments and maybe if they dont agree with them they leave rather than create what could become an argument. I think possibly that was what Rob had in mind when he made that ruling. So many times people have said “so and so was dissing something or someone so I left”. A possibility maybe?

          1. waylander Post author

            I can see that might be the reasoning behind such a ruling, but find it strange that he wouldn’t have explained his reasoning to his admins so you’re left having to second guess him

      1. Faye

        Oh heck Susan..I think the ‘negative chat’ may have 2 different meanings. Robs intention on keeping negative out is the comments made anti chatsite/room/Groups/Monitors and Admins etc…anything pertaining to the site. Negative as in problems that they might like to share or vent about is not included in this ruling….that is personal and if they want to add that to open chat it is their option although not always advisable.

  12. cefnrider

    wow i love this, better than achat room punch up lol,you tell her Faye, who rules on what is negativity or what is not???? as for acting like adults if you want foul language crudity and porn, you don,t need to come in here to pay for it asthere are plenty of so called adult sites do it for free.
    Why is it ppl have 2 weeks free use then as soon as they pay they start complaining about rules they knew all about before they joined and paid? seems very strange to me

  13. Scorpio

    My goodness what started out as an innocent blog surely raised some passionate responses. I’d just like to say,as my final comment,I still believe this site to be one of, if not the best,place to come for a good natter and meet like minded people. I only discovered it a few week’s ago but I’m so very glad I did and I’ve visited every day since. I know this doesn’t solve the empty room problem but I truly believe this site is the place to be and offers great value and the chance to make good friends along the way. So I’ll be staying hopefully for a long time to come. Happy chatting everyone.?

  14. Suzan1957

    Way, acting like adults does not include foul language, crudity and porn. I don’t know where that came from but just wanted to set the record straight that is why I joined this site was because I didn’t have to deal with the porn, crudity and foul language as is found on other chat sites. And glad you find this all amusing (better than a chat room punch), And stranger things have happened than people joining than complaining.

  15. catalpa

    It certainly has been apparent that the chat room has been less occupied. But then, I also find myself occupying it much less than I have over the past year. I suppose that this poses a big concern for some, and less so for others. The original blog asked the question regarding why it had become less occupied, and how the members could contribute to its increase. Being currently locked out of the chat room at the moment, I now find myself with added time to consider some thoughts.
    1. this whole ”ruling” of anti-negativity remains amusing to me, both in its label and its occurrence, but does reflect on the nature of the situation. This is not a monarchy, its a senior chat room. However both the leadership and the chatters seem to focus on this style as the true dynamic. The term ”negative ” is a very subjective one, but I understand its intent. We all have our ”safe” topics. My own definition of such things are possibly more broad than that of many other chatters, thus the restraint–and I’m sure many feel the same.
    2. I find it quite laughable that the question of a ”clique” in existence is being considered. Of course there are cliques. Sometimes we are part of them, and sometimes we aren’t. Often of u don’t see them, its because u are inside one…..lol. And yes, sometimes people can feel left out, but that happens in life, as we all know. You can’t legislate natural positivity, and u can’t legislate natural belonging, and its attempt to do so should be seen as no more than guidelines.
    3. I can only speak for my own reduced attendance in chat, apart from my recent ”lock out”– its just not pleasurable or interesting much of the time. Do I feel obligated to make it more so? yes. But how much time do we want to spend in pursuit such a task? the answer varies among chatters, but for me, its significantly less than in prior days. So if people stop coming in, or move on…. its not necessarily a big disaster in the scheme of life, but in the scheme of sc–its certainly less chatting.

  16. Maree

    As many of you know I am new to the room. What happens here is no different to other chat sites. Over all this is great place. I find the clash of different opinions can be excellent as long as we down take offence or feel victimised. Yes are adults we know not all will love or like us let alone our views. Buts let be come more tolerant of the unknown and the new. We can get along if we try …. wars fought all around the world over difference of opinion. We don’t have to make this chat room the same. Accept the different opinions and viewpoints and move on …other rise this chat room like many others will fold….and we down want hat Find away forward…as adults we have the capacity. Embrace the different idea s and experiences…..there are no winners or losers in different ideas.

    Each one of us has small personal victory if we can agree to disagree.

    My own idea over the years have evolved and been re- constructed.

    Its called personal growth and long may each one of us strive for that capacity. Happy Chatting all.

  17. roseinbloom

    I guess we can all improve the chatroom by using it more and trying to be entertaining and friendly and inclusive to all. I know some admins that are great at this but some seem to come in the chatroom to keep company with themselves.

  18. vonMichael

    All these answer give proof, all these members here have never talked to friends.

    !!! – Friends never talk in the back of…. – !!!

    Let me repeate one of your answer at this point Way, – fart, fart, fart, fart —