Do we really have the right ?
Do we really have the right to hurt others with our words ? Remember that old familiar saying we said as kids, “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” Did it really not hurt us? If we are honest, I think words are much more harmful. They can last a lifetime inside us.
If we take a moment to remember when we were young, can we remember hurtful things that were said to us? I remember being called “railroad tracks” and “tinsel mouth” , because I wore braces on my teeth. Children can be mean. We give them a ” free,get out of jail card” , because they are young. What do we give Seniors ?
After being on this site for 5 years now, it still surprises me how some people can not accept others because they are different from themselves. Are we all suppose to fit into a round hole, if we are a bit square?
Some chatters have left because they felt they did not fit in. Some were of different races. Some were of different cultures, different religions. Some have gender issues. Some have different sexual orientations.
As Seniors, I thought, somehow, we would be more accepting. Is this the Idealist in me? My Son tells me so. I do not think I can change after all these years. I see everyone equally the same. I was brought up this way by my parents. Whether you are a millionaire, or homeless. Whether you are black, yellow, tan, or white.
Whether you are straight, bi-sexual, or gay. We are all the same. This is what I was brought up to believe.
I for one, want a better world to live in. So, I hope before you start to say something that may be hurtful, I hope you will stop to think….Do I really have the right?
Peace and Love to All xx
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Nice one, and so thoughtful.
Thanks!
Thank you BCD. I sometimes think too much!! 😉
Passagio My aun tinstilled into me , with these words … ‘Always be kind to strangers , becasue thereby could stand an angel ” I hav enever forgotten those words becasue i was persecuted at school both by the nuns abnd some of the other children , becasue of my Greekg randmother all dressed in Black , and becasue my lunch was diffent to the Australian girls, i used to laugh and make jokes becasue that was the way I managed to survive myschool years …. I have never forgotten the bias and the nastiness and the canings becasue i was klefthanded and of a different race by the nuns ,,, not the children , they anly repeat what they hear… I make it my business to let everyone I come across know and hear that i care for them even if no-one else does….. Iam so like my English Mother both in colour and speech that no-one even is aware of my cultures in our family but I proudly tell all i meet if the subject comes up, that I am proudly of mixed race….
Kindness and understanding is one of the most inexpensive presents we can buy our neighbours and friends…..
I have a chatter here who comes in and every time she does she says to me , use proper grammer lani, your writing is not as it should be lani , and this was after I put up that i had recenlty been blinded by some treatemen I had at that time , so it would be known if I made some mistakes…. i asked her could she read? and she said yes! and i have had little trouble from her since…. i actually felt sorry for her…..
I apologise again for my written mistakes it,s becasue my left eye is troubled, and i also have a space kep problem on my lappy , i have had it repaired but it acts out now and again….
Thank you for your lovely response lani. I really like how you said, “Kindness and understanding is one of the most inexpensive presents we can buy our neighbours and friends.” Well said Lani! xx
Lani, I don’t consider Greek a differentt race, but you have been made to feel that way. Greece is the foundation of western civilization and I am shocked that you were treated so badly at school and I hope you keep typing because you always say nice things.
I was taught that people are put on earth Equal but Different and no person is the same as another so always be considerate of this- worked as a child but oh wow so very different now in the grown up world! X
I think I’d rather have a bunch of words thrown at me than a bunch of sticks and stones, tell that to the people who get stoned in weird countries who live by their religious laws and local laws, I’m sure they would agree that they would much rather have a few chosen words tossed their way. I as a young boy got called many things but I was taught by my parents to ignore the ignorance of others and just rely on my own judgement. I have my own beliefs about a lot of things but not to be shared on a blog in here as I know that there are those that would like to tear a new one in me, if you understand the expression. The pen is mightier than the sword, come on, a pen can kill just as well whether it be by words or stick it in your eye.
Thank you Ted. I see where you are coming from about people getting stoned to death. It is a terrible thing.
I am sorry you feel you can not express yourself freely in here. I have heard other people say this as well. They are afraid to post, because of the “attack” they will receive . We as Seniors should be afraid to voice our opinions. We don’t need to attack others that have a different point of view.
Wisely said Ted, ” a pen can kill just as well, whether it be by words or stick in your eye.”
We as seniors, should NOT be afraid to voice our opinions, is what I meant to say….
Passagio, you ask an interesting question. If we voice our opinions then some may be hurt. The lesson we were trying to learn as children with the “sticks and stones” is that we have to ignore a lot of what people say.
People do have freedom of speech in this country. I guess that is a right. There are limits like slander and threats.
Bloom, I think we can still voice our opinions without being rude or mean. It is easy to be told to ignore what people say about you, but I do think it is hard for some to do.
Thank you Passy…good blog…let us hope we can all get on and live peacefully.
Thank you Tania. I hope we can all learn to respect other people’s points of view. It takes maturity to do this, I feel. Let’s hope to live in more peace, especially in here. xx
There are often things I could say on here, but I hold my tongue (or should I say fingers) because I do not believe this is a medium to bare your soul on.
in general I’d agree with you that “if you can’t say anything nice then say nothing” although I also believe that there’s a time not to be nice, but those are rare and also really not for a chat site.
Thank you Way. I do agree with you about this might not be the right medium to bare one’s soul . I think we all have had to hold our tongue( fingers) at times.
Passy, you’ve got way too much time on your hands/fingers. 😳
Pam….I wish that was the case….It is just that my brain never turns off….. 🙁
Passy we certainly do not have the right to be nasty and hurtful to others, we do not have the right to judge others, we do have the rights to express an opinion without being shot down in flames by nasty comments from those who do not happen to agree, diplomacy and tact is all that is needed, you would have thought that as seniors we would have acquired this knowledge by now….alas not so in all cases………good blog….xx
Thank you Star. xx Yes you would think after all these years…..but for some as they become Seniors, gives them entitlement to say whatever they please, because somehow, they feel they have earned it?
well said Star fully agree….x
Thank you for the wonderful blog.
Thank you Blue . 🙂
Thank you Passa, wonder what triggered your comments? I can make remarks that may be taken the ‘wrong’ way. Of this I am sorry because nothing I say is ever meant to hurt just to amuse. One point I do take issue, ‘We are all the same’ this is clearly untrue – see your list of differences – no we are all different . I do know what you mean however it is how well we accept the ‘differences’ in people that makes for a compassionate civilised society.
Yes, Charles, you are the wiser one. You translated my blog correctly. You are very right, We are all different, but it is how we accept the differences in others. Thank you for helping clarify my thoughts. You write so well..Maybe we can get a blog or two out of you?? 🙂 🙂
Charles.I think Passaggio meant “we are all the same”, in that we are all human and our basic needs and feelings are the same.
Great blog passaggio. Thank you.
There is a saying “people who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.”
Thank you Luce. I like that saying too! 🙂
If all of humankind could master the art of being human, what a boring life we would lead. Ha ! 🙂
How true Luce! haha 🙂
This is my opinion : We should all have the right to say what we think as our opinion on any subject, regardless of who hears/reads it. If people want to share deep issues, then the others can chose to read and respond, or not to read it. No one is forcing anyone to read, write or respond to anything.
As seniors we should be mature enough to accept others way of life and thought, and if you can not accept, then its you that has the problem, not the other people.
Interesting you brought up the saying ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me’.
At one point in my life I found myself in an abuse group. I didn’t think I belonged there, until one person said to me that their bruises and bones mend easier than than damage to the mind. It was then I realized that words hurt more than stones.
If any of you feel you don’t ‘fit in’ in this site, come and talk to me….. cos Ive never ‘fitted in’ anywhere, and you know what? I don’t care. I have made some very good friends here at Senior Chatters who understand where I am coming from, and I cherish those friends.
A hand full of good friends, is worth more than 100 acquaintances. 😀
Peace be with you Passaggio 😉
Interesting that you talk of fitting in Polly, fitting in with what, what are we supposed to fit in with, I wouldn’t know, in all honesty do any of us feel that we fit in……… I don’t think that I do, what is it that I am supposed to think feel and do to be considered a part of the jigsaw, is it to establish a career, marry, live in a little quaint house, have 2.4 children and a adorable puppy running around, stay married to the same partner for a lifetime till death do us part………I haven’t a clue, if its the afore mentioned then I am certainly a square peg in a round hole, cos my life just wasn’t like that……..maybe its not to have an opinion and run with the crowd, I don’t do that either, would be too boring for me………so hands up…….I am a MISFIT………and I make no apologies for being so………xx
In every branch of life, whether its school or work or groups, you will always find one Queen Bee who has workers and nurses that follow her, and dislikes any that dont go along with her rules. The followers are afraid of becoming an outcast of the family, so will agree to dislike and hurt others and strive to ‘fit in’ with the swarm.
Then there are those who have no interest in joining the colony, and are quite happy to think, play and live without rules and instruction. These creatures are NOT misfits Star. nor followers. They are the inventors of their own life who are free to go and think for themselves.
🙂 xx
Thank you PollyPie. I sure do like the fact you are a square peg. I am too!! Maybe this is why we get on so well. 🙂 xx
Star, being a misfit makes you very special! 🙂 xx
Oh Passaggio, Im definitely not as boring as a square peg. Rather a very irregular shaped peg. 😆
hahahahahaha…You are the best PollyPie!! 🙂
Good comment, Polly. I agree with your take on it. This is what this site is about.. communicating with the written word, since that’s what we have. Obviously we don’t have the RIGHT to hurt others, but we are certainly given the OPPORTUNITY every time we begin to type. Because we have this opportunity we need to be mature about it, but as we all know not everyone is — some are facetious, snide and downright cruel and abusive. Others just try to tell the truth as best as they are able, but not everyone can receive the truth in the spirit in which is intended. I’m not sure how responsible we can be for the varying sensitivity level of all people. We do need to check ourselves from time to time, but being totally politically correct is heading in the direction of a nation of mindless zombies who talk about nothing but rainbows and butterflies for fear of offending someone. Just my opinion.. thanks for the blog 🙂
Thank you for your input and opinion Millie! 🙂
Quite welcome 🙂
We have no right but we do it. Why? People who do it have to face with a lack of cognition. That to explain would take a lot of time and to much paper to write on.
vonMichael, this might be a start of new blog. 🙂 I agree with you it would take an eternity to explain! 🙂
I wasn’t going to give this blog any credence however in support of those of like mind I will. Really doesn’t matter if I “have the last word” or not. Passy you have attempted to censor opposition for quite some time. Let me ad while saying this, Passy this reply is in no way meant from hate or animosity whatsoever toward you. Only stating obvious facts from personal experience. You have a double standard when it comes to freedom of opinions. Those who had opposing opinions know where of I speak. This blog is nothing more than yet another ploy to garner support to further your cause and quite frankly it’s out of line. You under no certain terms called me out on several instances when I had the politic group. You or the followers have no right to continue to empower yourself to monitor the goings on here. I wasn’t going to address this but, if you have an issue please be adult enough to address ME rather than take pot shots through dribble in a blog. That’s very immature Passy. If you say it be adult enough to own it. You certainly do not have to answer this in fact just answer to yourself, but I have a question, What on earth did I do to you to cause you such hatred? You promote “love and peace” and that’s all good but I’m confused. Love of what to whom? Those who follow you? Anyway, I want to reiterate, This reply is to your blog(s). It is in no way a dislike of you as a human. I hate no one however these days extremists translate truth to hate because it makes them a victim. One last thought, If it’s none of my business how you or the followers live your personal life you or them may want to reconsider posting on a public forum. Thank you for your contributions to the site. May you have a wonderful week.
Hello JSMILE,
First of all, thank you for your post. You have every right to your own opinion.
I am sorry you feel like my blogs are some ploy to garner support? Support of what I don’t know? My followers? I didn’t realize I had any? I honestly feel it is not me that has the problem here. Are you feeling guilty about something?
It saddens me to hear you call my blog dibble. But once again, it is your opinion.
I am sorry that my blogs offend you.
I am quite shocked really.
Don’t be shocked, passagio……….He seems to delight in being as negative as possible about , well, just about everything. You wrote a beautiful blog and had lots of beautiful comments. He just couldn’t let it go. He had to tear it down to make himself sound plausible. That seems to be his modus operandi…………Some people on this planet seem to be the happiest when they are being the most negative. I don’t even try to understand it anymore. It isn’t worth the time. No, I didn’t use his name. Don’t intend to, ever! Your blog was understood by intelligent people.
And what does that make you, Scotty? Mr. Positive? Not likely. It’s obviously worth your time to comment here and be negative toward a man that you do not know– the only thing you know is that he does not agree with you. This was best left between them b/c you obviously do not know what their history is. And using his name? What does that have to do with it. You have referenced him multiple times in several blogs and therefore you are engaging with him, however far above him you seem to think you are. One thing we agree on… this blog was understood by intelligent people.
?Contradicting yourself again millie… you are comstantly being negative about others u dont know. Annd you are constantly attacking scotties comments and r therefore engaging in him when he has a right to comment n voice his opinions as u always claim we have a right to. Stop trying to sound so intellectually superior to all comments ,it just looks silly n childish ,always a need to have last word n argue endlessly. Its life, deal w it as u say, let others talk n not have your ddouble standards. I look forward to reading your continuing contradictory childish unfair posts, oh, my opinion
I have been reading blogs from this site on Google for some time now and I’ve been shocked at how two people always seem to have the need to jump at others when their own opinions differ. Their replies arenot always civil but an over reach at going onand on with bible quotes. Now i MUST reply to you here jsmile andsay what ahorrible, mean, angry postyou left here lashing out at the poster passaggio. Jsmile you claim yout reply is not meant from hate or animosity, yet it reeks of it!! NO WHERE is passaggios writing is there any ref to you. Your writing is ridiculous and indeed angry and i find it appaling that you would blatantly lash out at someone who has been nothing but kind in her
writing as i can see. Jsmile you clearly have some sort of insecurity and anger issues, sadly.
And apparenty close buddy millie follows you, and you her, whenever you two want to gang up and argue with endless bible verses, and endless self rightious comments an dthen claim “just my opinion”. Well, certainly you both could be
much kinder and not so judgemental, evident in your need to continually jump on others opinions. I have not seen othersbe so mean and rude as two who claim to be religious posting bible on and on. I care not what your reply to me will be, i wont engage in your games.
Milton, It’s a shame that you read what you wanted to in the comments that I made. I won’t speak for Jsmile, but IF you actually read MY comments you will see that I state it is MY opinion repeatedly and I state that my comments come from MY beliefs that I don’t expect others to share at all. ALSO if you read the 2 prior blogs where the Bible was mentioned you will see that the references came AFTER others referenced the Bible. I was correcting a misconception and had every right to do so. There was nothing hateful or mean in anything I said. You could call it judgmental but you would be speaking about the Bible, It has been called worse and it speaks for itself and needs no defense. I believe it that’s my right and nothing whatsoever to do with you unless you make it your business. I thought that religion and sex were banned here, but they seem to creep into discussions rather frequently. IF and when that happens and IF I have an opinion, I will happily and freely share it in the future. Maybe you could go back and try to read with better comprehension. Obviously your feathers were ruffled b/c you don’t agree. That is your right… stop trying to take away mine.
As for the comment about Jsmile – I think YOU should stay out of it – it’s obviously between them and some things that have gone on between them in the past. You have no knowledge and therefore your opinion is unfounded. He’s a strong man and she a strong woman, both with obviously strong opinions. This is what happens in the grown up world. Deal with it.
Another double standard, YOU should stay out of it millie, and dont think uou are intellectually superior with your comments about intelligent people understand the blogs. How silly and childish. Yet yiu engaged in my comment to jsmile when u said u woulrnt speak for him. Hmmmm. And what doee it matteer what their historyis. He had no right to be so blatantly mean n attacking in public, in the end he just looks foolish n childish. Another thing u have no right to call my opinion unfounded. They are my opinions. Another contradictory double standaard comment by u who says we all have right to opionion so how do you call my opinion unfouned. U dont know it all. I pook forwwrd to your next laughable unnintelligent childish rant
By the way i DO know how to spell but my huge fingers cannot adequately post type on tiny smart phone. I am college educated retired executive in PR and i would never jire someone like those who have the need to contradict themselves all the time w self rightious argumentative childish rants
This is wwht reality is in the real educated world, millie, not starbux cafes. Deal with it
Lol…Oh Milton/Scotty whoever u are… when u are able to discuss this like an adult instead of a petulant child c’mon back. I’d love to debate the actual issues based on an informed opinion. I don’t lower myself to childish rants of name calling and attempted character assassination. I do hope u grow up before posting again on this site for adults.
NOT sure WHO MILTONJ is, but obviously a member who is unable to own up to its opinions under its real name.
What a coward you are !!!
Hope you get well soon. 😀
Millie once again u show yiyr inability to accept others opinions. Another double std , grow up n learn to accept others rights n comments, itis u n jsmile who started the mean vein here. Go ahead show your contulinued rants i wont be reAding anymore, let others see your immatirity. U both continue to contradict uourselves. How unintelligent u both really are. U continue to try to sound grown up but u are sad. Howintelligentcan u beto work at starbux. Im donereading blogs here so wont even see your continued lathetic reply.get a life. I have one
An educated one i may add. Bye. Milton
Dear Milton/scotty/charles/George /joe/bob?… , Since I don’t believe u won’t read this I’d just like to answer this on behalf of my coworkers at my 2nd job, Sbux. I do not care what u think of me but feel compelled to defend a mIsconception u seem to have. There are many people working there who are in school working toward their graduate degrees who are quite intelligent and are from all walks of life …some like me who got the job to provide medical insurance for my family when my husband was out of work. It’s a good job with excellent benefits including stock options. But lest u ali think this is an ad for Sbux.ha.I’ll just say that there are many intellectual stay at home mom’s that I know as well…they don’t let their jobs define them . Anyway I could build myself up to sound impressive if I discussed my primary occupation as well but I have no interest in impressing someone who is so shallow that they think this way. You’ve really shown your true colors.
One has to wonder the motive to keep picking on a dead subject. Milton, you aren’t even a member of this site therefore you really have no right to comment on ANY subject. Or could you be a member under assumed name attempting to appear supportive of the subject? I’m guessing since you have so much knowledge of members that couldn’t be found on google you are an impostor. I’m not even going to address YOUR own contradictions. You obviously are a frustrated bored human to spend time correcting and setting people straight. As far as Millie being childish, she is a great person. She is a member therefore she don’t have to “stay out” of it. Oh yes, she is intellectual. This has gone from a blog to hate. Once again my point proven some people cannot disagree agreeably. How sad it is grown assumed adults lash out as has been the case here. I’m not going to continue giving credence to this hatred of your little group. As far as me attacking anyone in public that’s rubbish. Yes your opinions ARE unfounded, hateful and out of line.Millie has every right to call you out. You say I look childish and foolish? Nice loving words there. You are stumbling over your own words with the double standard routine. Every time you post you prove your lack of tolerance, the hate in you and certainly the emptiness in your life. Your attacks to me are really meaningless. I’m simply replying to address you on the attack of members of this site particularly Millie in this case. She didn’t deserve your hateful rant. I truly am amused how big powerful people can be at a keyboard. Speaking of technology, when you’re typing misspelled words there’s red line that appears under said word. I’m sorry but I couldn’t make out some of what you said due to the spelling. You’re an “executive” and you’re on a website engaging in confrontation with complete strangers?? Hmmm that’s a chin scratch moment. Cause one to wonder if milton is really scotty. Now lets all go catch butterflies and be happy.. Just my two cents! lol
If u can read jsmile i stated i was a retired* executive. U seem so bothered by my opinion ot makes me laugh. !,read your own line, to yourself, that is , you r a frustrated bored human to spend time correcting n setting people straight. Another sho of your dbl stds. !oh and millie intellectual? Hardly when she works at starbux? Yes she has posted that before n my wife was a memberhere a couple years ago but i care not to join, just read blogs on the web sometiimes, but had to call u out when u lashed at at pasaggio. Also its u n millie who never let an issue die, always arguing when confronted. I have a life, unlike u two, laughable. I wont be reading anymore here so wont see what nonsense u write next. Apparently your life consists of folpowing each oter around
Great comment, milton………..and oh, soooooooooooo true…….:)
Dear Passy
I really liked your blog
ty xxxxx ellie
Thank you so much Ellie. It appears not everyone shares your same opinion. 🙂
I am glad you enjoyed it. xx
It appears my Blog has caused a lot of unrest. I asked the question, Do we have the right? It appears some feel they do have the right. If you read in the middle of this blog, I was attacked, because someone felt I was targeting them. No names were mentioned in my blog. Quite honestly, only one other person took offense to my blog. I am not sure why some were upset with my blog?
Then in the middle of the blog, some people became hostile towards one another. Name calling, throwing insults around like they were candy. Then finally have come the accusations.
Well bloggers, I think you can see the answer to my question.
Passy this is why I stopped blogging. Not pretty is it?
No Laurie , it is not pretty!! It is very sad that you have stopped blogging.
No none of it is pretty when it leaves the issue and becomes personal. I apologize for my part in your blog being hijacked.
Wow !! Passy, what started as a simple question turned into venomous, bile spewing reading………not sure how this happened………you sure got your answer, albeit indirectly……….yep, would seem some peeps do feel they can say what they like, and in any manner they choose…….tact and diplomacy gone for a burton then,……….so much for free speech……… Oh Well xx
Star,
Very well said!!
Everyone who replied exercised free speech in any manner they wished. Yes there was some bile spewing Star. There is certainly enough opinions to go round. It has become somewhat funny now because of the contradictions. The very ones preaching tolerance and love are attacking. Major hypocrisy is obvious. Passy you had your question answered in many formats and opinions. What I can’t understand is how directly approaching a subject with a individual is interpreted as hate. How being honest is attacking. I really don’t grasp that. If I have an issue with someone I address that person directly. It’s the right thing to do. Some reading this will shake their head but I need to say this, it’s childish and extremely immature to hide behind your comments. We’re suppose to be adult seniors but the weakness and hatred expressed of some is truly saddening. As I’m referred to as “one of the two” I and # 2 never once mentioned hatred to anyone yet we are charged with hate. Why? Because we gave an opinion? Because some simply didn’t agree? I can disagree with you without (hating) you. Please review the comments here and honestly tell yourself who is the real haters. I never once attacked anyone’s character I addressed the (((issue))). I stated in a earlier reply I was addressing the topic NOT the person yet some STILL see hate instead of a simple debate. That is so sad people have selective vision. They have so much frustration and hate in their heart they cannot have a simple disagreement without hating the person. Yes there has been a great deal learned here. Disclaimer!!!>>>This is in no way meant to hurt or show hate to anyone reading. Thank you passy for the blog and the revelation. I have learned much. “just my two cents” J
Jsmile,
This is YOUR perspective and YOUR opinion. Other’s have voiced different views from yours. I thank everyone for their perspectives and opinions.