A real man is a woman’s best friend. He will never stand her up and never let her down. He will reassure her when she feels insecure and comfort her after a bad day. He will inspire her to do things she never thought she could do; to live without fear and forget regret. He […]
BIG TROUBLE
There were two young brothers, 8 and 10 years old, who were exceedingly mischievous. Whatever went wrong in the neighborhood, it turned out they had a hand in it. Their parents were at their wits’ end trying to control them. Hearing about a pastor nearby who worked with delinquent boys, the mother suggested to her […]
WORLD CUP
The seven dwarfs went off to work in the mine one day, while Snow White stayed at home to do the housework and cook their lunch. However when she went to the mine to deliver their lunches, she found there had been a cave-in, and there was no sign of the dwarfs. Tearfully she yelled […]
DROVERS
Two Aussie cattle drovers standing in an Outback bar. One asked, “What are you up to, Mate?” Ahh, I’m takin’ a mob of 6000 from Goondiwindi to Gympie.” “Oh yeah … and what route are you takin’?” “Ah, probably the Missus; after all, she stuck by me durin’ the drought.”
A SENIOR’S WORTH
What are seniors citizens worth? They are worth a fortune, with all the silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, stones in their kidneys and lead in their feet. As for myself, I have become a little older since I saw you last and a few changes have come into my life since then. […]
SEX AND THE OVER 90’S
(I HOPE THIS DOESN’T OFFEND ANYONE) Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent’s house to visit her 95-year-old grandmother and comfort her. When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, “He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning”. […]
NEW BABY
For weeks a little boy told his teacher about the baby that was coming to his house. One day, his mother let him feel the baby move in her tummy. He then stopped telling the teacher about the baby. The teacher finally asked, “What happened to the baby you were expecting at your house?” The […]
TEN COMMANDMENTS
A teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to “honor thy father and thy mother,” she asked, “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?” Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family of seven) […]
DOG COLLAR – true story from newspaper
“A friend has a shaggy dog and couldn’t seem to get the electronic dog collar to work. He put the collar on himself and told his wife to push the button when he got about 1/4 mile away. He would let her know he was ready when he blew the car horn. Upon hearing the […]
LOVE EVERLASTING
Things in life happen When you are not even looking Love seems to come When we don’t even care When life seems so helpless And filled with despair You wake up each morning Dazed and confused Just thinking about the past Lonely and used But in pain and sorrow Is when god seems to listen […]
