Away From Narcissim
Let’s get together or vent about our ex narcissist or “should be” ex. Have you been scorned, degraded, abused and totally annihilated by a narc? If so share your experience here. I will start blogging on this topic tomorrow.
Before I start I would like to know if anyone out there is interested? I have a 30 year story to share about someone who has been in and out of my life. Hopefully he is gone for good but not until he left me totally broken and the biggest disappointment of my life. I am still reeling from him.
The worst part are the victims the narc leaves in their wake. I have discovered through my extensive research that it can take years to get over these people. And they keep coming back, also known as hoovering.
Feel free to chime in and start the ball rolling. I look forward to talking with all.
Recommend0 recommendationsPublished in Senior Chatters
Hi sololee ,I’m sure you will find lots of people interested on your story ,me included !
Looking forward to your blogs ! 🙂
Sololee, It sounds like a good story. You sound so honest and that makes a huge difference. I would love to hear your story and anyone else who chooses to reply.
I just have to hear more about the “hoovering” concept.
So, umm, why on Earth would anybody want to wallow in the past especially when it was supposedly miserable….get a grip and move on! Self defeating behaviors are really unhealthy, mentally and physically.
The “narc” reference is confusing. Never heard that used by anybody who wasn’t going to get busted eventually anyway. You sound terribly confused about how to manage your life…then and now.
Absolutely not wallowing in the past. “Narc” is short for a narcissist. Just sharing information.
Hi solo lee, well don.t know the expression Hoovering, but i ernestly hope you move forward and put that person where they belong, completely out of your life.
and very quickly too…
mix with uplifting people who make you feel like you are, as important as everyone else . xx. Lani
I have never encountered any of that behaviour, but I am aware people do for whatever reason……….would be very interested to hear your story and why you let it happen…….30 years is such a long time to be under someone’s control…….. which it appears you were…….
Sololee, I sympathize with you for your ordeal which sounds extremely traumatic and commend you for sharing it with us. I did a little research after reading your blog as I was unfamiliar with the terms hoovering and narc and this is what I found:
Urban Dictionary defines hoovering as follows:
Being manipulated back into a relationship against your will with threats of suicide or self-harm, threats of harm to others or property, or threats of false criminal accusations. A “hoover” is relationship blackmail. Relationship manipulation is often associated with individuals suffering from personality disorders like Borderline Personality Disorder or Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
On Wikipedia I found this description of Narcissistic Personality Disorder:
Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a personality disorder in which a person is excessively preoccupied with personal adequacy, power, prestige and vanity, mentally unable to see the destructive damage they are causing to themselves and to others in the process. It is estimated that this condition affects one percent of the population. First formulated in 1968, NPD was historically called megalomania, and is a form of severe egocentrism.
Sololee, those who control, manipulate, stalk or abuse others need to be stopped. They must be told that such behavior will not be tolerated and ordered to keep their distance. If they do not comply voluntarily, there are legal means to stop them in the form of restraining orders. I would encourage you to take the necessary steps to free yourself permanently of this individual; you owe that to yourself. I wish you the best.
Sololee, I would be honored to read your story – with an open heart; as well as any other chatter who tells their tale. If I have understood correctly, you were looking for and hoping to give chatters a place to vent or cleanse if you will – both, IMHO, are much needed in life from time to time. I could write a response, I have a story, not sure if I would choose to. That is a very personal decision. I wish you well Sololee, the very best.
Harsh words tessa. I would like to hear more of sololee ‘s story. I could tell a story or two about manipulation and bullying..but i doubt if i ever will. laurie’s blog was an eye opener and a blog i will study more in the coming days. Thank you laurie. 🙂
ya the truth hurts. denial hurts worse.