THE LOBSTERS AND I C 1998 Jojo
THE LOBSTERS AND I
C 1997 JoJo
My husband was transferred by his Company to Sydney, Nova Scotia for a period of eighteen months. We rented a beautiful home in Marion Bridge, (which is approximately 16 kilometers from Sydney) on the banks of the River Mira. We soon fell in love with both the area and Cape Bretoners, whom we found to be unfailingly warm, helpful and extremely friendly.
In Cape Breton, the lobster season is the major event of the year. People talk about it for weeks before it happens. Once the season opens, every able-bodied man takes to his boat and steams out to sea.
Our first lobster season in Cape Breton began May 14, 1994.
I was excited over the prospect of frequent lobster dinners at La Casa W.! Being so expensive elsewhere in Canada, they’d never fared on the W. menu. In fact, I couldn’t remember the last time we’d eaten one.
Consequently, May 15 I drove down to Louisbourg and found a fisherman who had just come into port with his day’s catch. He picked out two bruisers from his basket and put them in a plastic bag. I paid him and was about to go off when it suddenly occurred to me that I didn’t have the slightest idea of how to cook a lobster, never having done it before. So I asked the fisherman for instructions.
“Well dear, yous gets a big pot and fills ‘er three quarters full with water and puts it on the stove. Then yous adds salt and a quarter cup of sugar. When it comes to the boil, yous tosses in yer lobsters”.
“But how do I kill them?” I asked.
“How do yous kill them? Har har har – Charlie come and listen to this one. This lady wants to know how yous kill lobsters. Harry and Fred, come on over here and tell this nice lady how yous kills lobsters”.
We all had a good laugh and then Charlie said “Why dear, yous just tosses them into the pot upsoid down and it kills them right off. Mind you, they’s gotta go in upsoid down or they tenses up and the meat is tough as leather”. (The lobsters tense up – how inconsiderate of them!)
This information made me turn pale. The idea of tossing a live animal into a pot of boiling water made my stomach heave. Then I started telling my inner, squeamish self that it was no different from what happens to fish; in fact, I told myself, it was probably considerably more humane. My inner self remained unconvinced.
“And what about these rubber bands around their claws?” I asked.
“Oh yous gotta cut them off before yous throws yer lobster into the pot or it’ll taste right rubbery.”
By this point I felt like fainting. “Take them off? Won’t the lobster pinch me if I take them off?”
Grabbing a lobster, Harry said “No no dear, you’s jest folds his claws over each other in the front loike this, hold on toight and snips off the rubber bands. It’s easy, don’t yous worry”.
By this time “yous” was past worrying – “yous” was well into the panicking stage!
I took the lobsters home feeling crushed with guilt. With a decided lack of enthusiasm, I hauled out my large pot, filled it with water, added the sugar and salt and brought it to the boil.
Gingerly I approached lobster number one. I folded its claws in front as per Charlie’s instructions and snipped off the rubber bands.
So far so good.
Suddenly the lobster wriggled furiously and I dropped it. It landed on my foot and grabbed my toe with its now unfettered claw. With a yell I shook my foot furiously, sending it flying across the ceramic tiled kitchen floor. It proceeded to scuttle along sideways with our two dogs hot in pursuit. Our female, Shango, was especially keen because she there’s nothing she likes better than chasing cats and squirrels, and here was something new to chase. Although brimming with enthusiasm, she skidded to a halt when the lobster turned and fixed her with a baleful eye,
waving its claws in a menacing manner.
As for me, I can honestly say it was the first time in my life that I’d ever had to chase my dinner. I managed to retrieve it without getting pinched a second time and popped it and its brother into the pot.
My husband, who hadn’t gone through the trauma I’d endured, thoroughly enjoyed his but I couldn’t eat mine. I kept wondering if it was the one who’d pinched my toe.
From that day onwards, the lobsters I purchased were from a nearby gas station, and were all pre-cooked in sea water. I simply warmed them up in the microwave and they were delicious.
I like my food to be dead before I cook it.
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Absolutely delightful read!!! Thanks for sharing that, jojo!
Thanks so much for your comment autumnangel – I am delighted you enjoyed it.
Poor jo jo No wonder you didn,t enjoy your dinner. A bit of ignorance, or pretending ignorance is a blessing sometimes. Iprefer to buy them straight from the supermarket, “where no animals are killed”. Now that,s really sticking your head in the sand ,isn’t it, and one other place too.!!!!!!!
I agree with you cag – ignorance can definitely be bliss! Had I realized I was going to have to toss a live creature into a pan of boiling water “upsoid down” I wouldn’t have purchased live lobsters, nor did I ever do so again.
There’s a post script to this story. On the evening of the day it appeared in The Cape Breton Post, I received a phone call from an obviously very drug lobster fisherman.
“Are yous da lady wot wrote that story about the lobsters?” he asked with a loud hiccup.
“Yes,” I replied delighted to have a fan taking the trouble to phone me to say what a great read it was.
“Well, yous fulla SHIT!” he said and hung up.
Well that pricked my bubble nicely! lol
Thanks so much for your comment Cag – I really appreciate it.
Jo really funny story and I have cooked lobster tails but not a whole lobster. This first time I ever ate a lobster was when my husband and I went up to Maine and we bought a whole loster and I haven’t had a whole lobster since. I love Crabs living in Maryland but I don’t like to eat the steamed ones because I don’t like cracking open the claws to get the meat out . But Maryland is noted for their steamed crabs done with Old Bay Seasoning on them which everybody puts on the crabs when they steam them in a pot. Thanks for posting this story.
How interesting that Maryland is famous for its steamed crabs, Marie. Sadly, I’ve become allergic to lobsters, crabs, oysters and anything in the ocean that has a shell! I love all of it, but can’t eat it. 🙁
Thanks for your comment.
A great story well told, but I read it in awe. I’m no coward, but I couldn’t pick a lobster (or crab) up with my bare hands to save my life.
Thanks mariner – can’t pretend it was easy – I was scared stiff, but it had to be done – I had a hungry husband coming back from work who needed to be fed!
Thanks for your comment – I really appreciate it
Great story, as usual, jojo. I love seafood, especially lobsters, crabs and prawns, but prefer to have it cooked by someone else LOL Unfortunately lobsters are too expensive now for me. 🙁