Most Embarrassing or Most Humorous Moment (Take Your Pick)

Some years ago I was admitted to the local public hospital for a one-day surgical procedure. Without being prurient about it, the surgery involved reducing a benign growth, called a hydrocele, in a delicate part of my anatomy. In another couple of years the hospital would boast a brand new state of the art surgical wing. But when i went in that luxury lay yet in the future. So the upshot was by the time I was papered, signing away my first born, and relieving the hospital, the doctors, urologist, anesthesiologist, radiologist, pathologist, residents, nurses, nurse assistants, janitors, all their heirs and assigns of liability for so much as silently passing gas, now and forever. Then I was, per usual stripped of all dignity and given one of those hateful hospital gowns that, try as I might, would not pull down further than my navel. But I salvaged the shreds of dignity and decency with a sheet and a soon administered shot of pre-surgical “give a sh** juice in my IV. Soon thereafter they could have chased me buck-naked down the halls snapping my derriere with a wet towel and I’d not have cared a farthing. It seemed as though, through the semi-conscious state of me, that I waited in the surgical ready room or whatever they called it while my two nursing assistant gurney wheelers, entertained each other with family and staff gossip. Finally they received some sort of orders and I was once again trundling but not into a surgery suite. Instead they were rolling me down a hall to another part of the hospital. More than that; they were snickering and chuckling to one another and whisper, whisper, hee, hee, heeing as we bumped along. Finally one of them leaned over me and said through a barely supressed giggle, and said it loudly too, “ARE YOU GONNA HAVE A BABY???” Whereupon the rest of the way was accompanied by shrieks of loud laughter and thigh slapping whoops. “HE DONE GONNA HAVE A BABY, YASS INDEED!!!! WHOOOWEEE, HAW, HAW, HAW.”

My urologist later informed me that because the schedule was tight and overcrowded for all of the surgery suites he had me taken to another part of the hospital. So it was I had my hydrocele reduced in a maternity ward delivery room.