Domestic violence

In Australia at the minute there is finally a whole lot being done, Schools and sporting clubs are going to be taught to respect women, It starts when the youth are young .
In this country in the past couple of years we have not only had partners and wives assaulted in their homes but a tragic amount of Children being killed by partners and Fathers,
No-one seems to know what has caused this influx of child assaults, but feel it is mostly to punish the Mothers of ex partners, this is a dreadful indicment on our society and has to be stopped , so a host of financial resources has been put into place, some new laws are ...that any partner that has been assaulted in or outside the home by a partner, will now be able to recieve a package , of financial assistance to set up another safe home to live in , away from the offending partner and paid leave from work for a certain amount of time to settle in their new home ..
There will now be a task force to prosecute offending partners, quickly and precisely whereas before the Police did not like going to domestic issues''
We are having a white ribbon day, each year to speak up against Domestic Violence All of these new Laws will be executed quickly ..
Possibly other countries have the same issues so it will be interesting if any take up the Australian Governments lead, and investigate these new beneficial laws...of which there are too many to place here,, here's hoping for a positive change .....

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Published in Senior Chatters

Comments

  1. cappuccino

    Its nice to see something being done Lani,the previous “head in the sand”approach wasnt working,but I have to wonder if we are treating the symptom,not the disease…as you say,the causes are poorly understood so this is at least a start.
    There is much more I could say on this subject,but,for now,will hold off till Iv read other peoples opinions.

    1. lani36 Post author

      think the work shopping on this issue have come up with a few causes , one alcoholism , Drug taking , former tragic childhood lifestyle, It has been found that wealthy or lack of finances make little difference .
      There are many other casues of course Mental Instabilty , , so that has to be adressed and is also as important as domestic violence.
      Pressure on males n to meet their financial obligations , on Maintenece issues , instead of constant pressure it maybe advisable to garnisheer wages instead of constant letters ..
      Also the pressure of those financial obligations if they take on a new wife or family , while trying to support the former, so there seems to be many causes all of which have to be addressed..
      However it is good to see that something is being done at last before any more children are harmed and partners of course ….

  2. roseinbloom

    Lani. I am on my Mobil phone so this Will be short
    The USA changed many laws due to the women’s movement i, the 70s and 80s. We made a lot of progress, but none recently
    That is a great idea to help women get to safety
    The women,s groups do that. Here. Killing children or their parents is so cruel.everybody must not sit silently on this issue or speak for it

  3. sylvestercat

    Hi Lani,Yes,it is a national disgrace in our land,cowardly men taking advantage of women in a violent way.I feel for the young children who witness such abuse and the turbulent wake it leaves on lives.I`m sure there are many issues at play here and if I ever saw the need of a comprehensive study of cause and affect,then this issue must come first.

  4. Faye

    Nice to see something being done. Over here we get the impression many Aussie men are still way back in the chauvinistic days….you know the kind, they bark the orders and everyone jumps including women and children. Yes, we have them here to but now when a report of ‘domestic violence’ comes in the Police do something about it. It has resulted in a lot of the refuges for women overflowing…I know the local one is. There is also talk of a mens refuge to as violence against a partner or spouse by the women is also increasing. Last week our local court sitting had 2 such cases of men abusing women. Overall it seems to be on the decrease though.

  5. grandmaj

    It’s great that more is getting done to help these people. As this is my line of volunteer work I see it all the time. It’s not just Aussies though Faye. In my experience for the last 3 years it is a lot of ethnic men as well. All different nationalities. When one of my Co workers looked in the eyes of a certain nationality male, she was punched in the face. Apparently in his beliefs women are prohibited to look a male in the eyes. He could not believe he was arrested for beating his wife. He said it was his right. He argued with the judge saying he will continue to beat his wife she is dirt, and his property. Long story short he was jailed for 2 years for beating his wife and went back to court for the assault on the female worker. I have many many stories.

    1. Faye

      Oh I didnt meant to insinuate it was only Aussie men Gran. I realize it is a world wide thing and something that will be around for a long time due to the customs of different countries. With the Aussies and the Kiwi being interchangeable, so to speak, we hear of it such a lot is all. Yet my step daughter married an Aussie and he was a big soft teddy bear. In every country there are those who believe it is their right to be abusive to their wives and children and in turn their children grow up believing the same way. My ex was an abuser and in turn my eldest son also has the same tendency…quick tempered and out of control if you dare disagree with him. Then he wonders why the rest of the family dont have a lot to do with him. A shame really but he has been spoken to about it and just ignores the advice anyway…cause he knows best….just like the menfolk who continue to abuse their spouses all over the world…:-)

  6. cefnrider

    i agree with the comments but it must also be remember that a lot more men are coming now after being physically and mentally abused b their partners for years. So please dont make this an issue of one sex against another.
    As for laws there have been laws in the UK for many many years helping to protect the wife or partner from any such abuse, but as an old court official i also know how many cases never got to court becausethe partner refused to press charges making the law a laughing stock
    There is never any excuse for violence against children and the person doing the aussault male or female should be put away for a very very long time with an order banning them from coming near children unless they have been completely rehabilited into society
    We must do all we can to ptotect everyone, female, male, child, mentally ill, sick and the aged and not have a crusade against just one sex because i am afraid it is not only one sex but both sexes that are to blame

    1. roseinbloom

      I understand what you are saying and violence to women is about fairness and full equality for women. The fundamental religions teach that women are to serve and be lead by men. I don’t know how women can say they follow every word of the religions and not be submissive and subservient . Women and men need to learn new ways of living together in peace and harmony.

    2. roseinbloom

      Lani, I am happy to hear that Australia is making such great strides in protecting and supporting women. Here in the USA, the support is done by nonprofits or charities. The government is still behind most other countries in providing support to women and children in abuse situations. We call ourself the richest nation on earth, and the contradiction is hard to justify.
      Who has ever been abused in a way that would need a law made or police protection? Most or all women have been abused to this extent.
      This includes beatings, rapes, murders, sexual harassment and loss of economic support in their lifetime. There have been laws and policy changes in the USA to address those issues and things are a lot better than they were, but we still have a gender gap economically and women are still victims of abuse and violence. Progress still is needed in our country. I never knew that I was expected to be submissive to men until much later in life. My parents did not raise me to be submissive or not to get an education or not to have a destiny. I had to learn that Later in life. I had to learn that the laws would not be fairly applied. As I learned, the laws were changing, but we never passed an Equal Rights Amendment in the United States. We are still trying to get equal pay for equal work. Young women are more aggressive and assertive and expect full equality, but full equality is not here yet. Men are bigger and stronger than women in most cases and that is a biological fact .. Women are child bearers and can nourish infants and they are very vulnerable and need to be safe and protected. Laws and government must work hard to support and enable the mothers of young children. The men and fathers usually have laws and means to protect themselves, and the laws are there to protect them, if they are a victim.

  7. grandmaj

    You are right Cef it does happen to men as well, sorry I didnt put that in my reply. But I have seen that as well. I dont know if not as many cases come to court for the men is because they are ashamed to think a woman is doing this to them or not. Yes the majority is men abusing women but yes it does happen to men as well. If the police are called out to a incident of domestic abuse, the police put in the case to the courts. There is then an automatic domestic violence order awarded to the victim. The victim doesnt get a choice if it is a police order. Some of them try talk the judge out of it but they cant. As the police get sick of going to the same house weekend after weekend if the victim is not going to press charges. So many complex cases.

  8. roseinbloom

    In our country, 90 per cent of all law enforcement and judges are men. At least 90 percent of all governing bodies are men. I think things are changing, but the group not represented in the process is in danger of not being treated fairly. I remember the sixties and the police department was sued for damages due to a refusal to file a complaint and failed to protect a woman. In the seventies, police take protecting women very seriously. We are talking about equal rights and equal protection. Either party can be abused, but if one party is bigger, stronger, in control of more money and resources, how much protection does he need?If he is being abused, he can leave the situation. As Lani said in her blog, the laws are about giving women a safe place and a means to get out of an abusive and dangerous situation. If men need a safe place the laws would be reversed, but check out the statistics, and we know that women are being abused in most of the situations.

  9. cefnrider

    please dont use statistics rose s everyone knows statistics are what people want to use them for and whether they are for or against the subject.
    Do any of your statistics say how many times ppl are charged with domestic violence and it never goes to court because the person drops the accusation beforehand ?????
    Of course lots of men never come forward to admit to domestic violence or abuse from a woman because they are afraid of being scorned or laughed at by their own mates. But slowly they are starting to come out and say it
    There are absolutely no statistics which say how many men or women or children are the victims of domestic violence because of the simple fact loads never get into the statistics#
    So please dont make this into a sex thing as it affects everyone old middled aged and young, men, ladies, girls boys and i am sorry to say babies

  10. roseinbloom

    Cef, if you don’t like statistics, then have your say and lets all pretend that men are not usually the aggressors. I have been abused by a man and I never abused anyone. You are not in The United Staes and I am not in UK or Australia, so I will not try to dispute what goes on in the countries in which I do not live. I spent years and years in grad school studying human behavior. and I know that the shelters here get filled with WOMEN and children.

    1. Faye

      Rose, may I ask…do they have centres for abused men there? I do have to agree with CEF though in that men dont come forward as much due to the stigma of getting teased by mates…many of whom themselve are possibly abused. But this kind of thing doesnt seem to be talked about by men, to men, as much as women. The women tend to talk amongst themselves if they have suffered any abuse and that is where they get support from. There is talk of a place for men in my little town where abused men can go so I hope it goes ahead because they are centres that are needed.

      1. roseinbloom

        Faye, I don’t think we have escape shelters for abused men. There are many homeless shelters here for men, but there are not that many men stalking men who do not have the means to get away from them. If we are speculating on the numbers of men who do not report, that can be fairly ridiculous.
        I see this violence as part of a need for full equality for women in the world today.

  11. lani36 Post author

    Cef, I agree with you to an extent ,Men can be abused especially verbally by a partner , they can usually leave until things cooldown , the ratio of women being abused and more so the little children in our Country more so than ever , are being killed , however it does go on in both sexes , I agree with the genral abuse if one can call it that to both partners especially in these days of drug taking etc..
    However woman of small children still at home with a bullying partenr can suffer terrible abuse ,they have no or little income to leave,they stay to protect their babies, because they are so frightened , and .
    This year the Mothers that did leave quite a few of them ,their partners on visiting days with the children have been murdering the children , mainly for two reasons ,this has come to note— one for revenge ,becasue shes left, or 2. becasue he doesnt want to have the financial burden of his children if he starts another relationship .
    I can only speak of my country becasue as a social worker in the past and dealing with these issues,i have seen it all, some have nowhere to go , and yes some partners do drop the case against the abuser becasue they have been threatened , or they falsy believe it won’t happen again because the abuser has said how sorry they are ,but what they fail to realise if it happens once it can happen again… I do feel that our Goverment is on the right track with education in schools and in the workforce about respect for Woman… more secure homes for the women and children to run too in a likely abusive episode etc. and tim eoff if their working to resettle somwhere safe .

  12. CSweet51

    I have to go with cef on this one. There are more and more men coming out and reporting their abuse. (USA) It has to be very difficult for a man to do that.
    Rose, you mentioned that religion says that women should be subservient to the men….Yes, men should be the head of the household but what so many people fail to add to that is that a man is to love his wife as Christ loves His church. If that is the case then I wouldn’t have an issue with a husband as the head of the household. Of course I am not married so I guess it doesn’t make a difference….

  13. starlette

    Well I just have to put my two pence worth in here……..women should be subservient to men !! and men should be the head of the household……..excuse me, what century are we living in……….gobsmacked that anyone really believes that’s the way it should be…….