Category Archives: Jokes & Humour

 Dear Mr Trading Standards

I would like to report a breech of trading standards law stated in the The Consumer Protection from Unfair Trading Regulations 2017: In particular those that cover misleading practices, like false or deceptive messages, or leaving out important information. I have been using an accountancy program called Sage. This title I believe mis-represents the program – let me […]

 Dear Mr Taxman

Dear Mr Taxman, all is forgiven. You will be ever so pleased to know that my T-shirt is washed, I am now showered and free of all stickiness and my pending alcoholism has been put on hold. I have a found a copy of my P60. At the earliest opportunity (not tonight I am at […]

 I was weak……..i gave in…….

I did something in bed last night that i had not done for many a week……i am not proud of the excuses i had been making, but to me they were genuine reasons………i couldn’t get comfortable enough no matter how much i plumped the pillows up……..i didn’t want the light on, was too stark and […]

 Sex Jokes or Pearls of Wisdom

I wish people would share their life and their wisdom more with me. I know some people who are much wiser and I would like to hear from them. I wish people would share more of the ways their countries live and deal with issues. I do try to share what I think is interesting […]

 JOKES FOR TODAY. :D

MONDAY The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex… Worried the girl might become pregnant and adversely impact the family’s status, she consulted the family doctor. The doctor told her that teenagers today were very wilful and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. He […]

 : RETIRED HUSBAND – heaven help us all. Joke.

RETIRED HUSBAND After retiring, George’s wife insisted that he accompany her on her trips to TESCO. (a British Supermarket Chain) Unfortunately, like most men, George found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, his wife is like most women – she loves to browse.. Yesterday his wife received the following […]

 Ronnie Barker Joke. :D

This was originally shown on BBC TV back in the 1970’s. Ronnie Barker could say all this without a snigger, though God knows after how many takes. The irony is, BBC received not one complaint. T he speed of delivery must have been too much for the whining herds. Try getting through it without converting […]

 Irish Miracle. A Joke.

Murphy drops some buttered toast on the kitchen floor and it lands butter-side-up. He looks down in astonishment, for he knows that it’s a law of nature of the universe that buttered toast always falls butter-down. So he rushes round to the presbytery to fetch Father Flanagan. He tells the priest that a miracle has […]

 Different types of humour………whats your favourite….

Myself and my good friend and sparring partner ozzybloke were chatting today ……….the subject of humour cropped up……….now I know there are different types of humour……sit-coms, jokes, even black humour ozzy…lol……….and certain types appeal to different people……..was just wondering what gives you a good laugh……I love to see Peter Kay, his is observational, things that […]

 Naughty one for you. Joke. :D

A sexually active middle aged woman informed a plastic surgeon that she wanted her vaginal lips reduced in size because over the years they have become loose and flabby. Out of embarrassment, she insisted that the surgery remain secret, and of course, the surgeon agreed. Awakening from the anesthesia, she found three roses carefully placed […]